Monday, October 8, 2018

If You Blame People For The Bad - You Also Have To Blame Them For The Good

                                        "Quit blaming your past for your current condition.
                                        Yesterday has nothing to do with today or tomorrow
                                                         unless you decide it does."
                                                              - Grant Cardone

It's easy to blame others for our misery, failures and misfortunes in life.

Our parents weren't there for us when we were kids. Our siblings gave us a lot of misery while we were growing up. Our teachers didn't have faith in us and put us down. Our spouse wasn't supportive and didn't care and our friends are negative and self absorbed.
And the list goes on and on and on.

You can always come with some reason(s) why your current situation is not working because of something someone else did or didn't do.

Of course blaming others allows us to take ourselves off the hook because it wasn't our fault.
It was theirs.

                                      "When you think everything is someone else's fault.
                                                          you will suffer a lot."
                                                                  - Dalai Lama

Now I get it....there are a lot of miserable and terrible people out there in the world.
I have met some of those people myself. And yes, there have been some awful things done to me, and some people that were very close to me betrayed me in the most awful way
But even the most negative and miserable person can teach us something....if we are willing to look at the lesson.

Here is another way of thinking about it.
This "bad person(s)" that did you wrong and created such a mess in your blame them for all the bad things...…right?
Now, how about all the good things that they did or the good things that came out of the experience?
Are you also blaming them for those?

If you blame someone for all the bad, you also have to blame them for all the good.

I don't believe that anyone is "all bad" and that any experiences is ever "all bad" or wasted.

Even the worst parent, spouse, sibling, friend, teacher, boss or co-worker can teach us something.

If you keep on blaming people, you will end up stuck in life.
Yes, they might have done something terrible to you, but now you can make a decision to move on and create a better future for yourself or you can remain stuck in the past.
The choice it totally up to you.

                       "To solve a problem you have to recognize your share of responsibility. "

If you reflect back on the person and the situation, do you think that you can find something good that came out of it?

You might have to look a little closer..... but let's be honest...... this person might have ignited some great talent in you that you didn't know you had but you had to develop it when this person walked away from you?

Maybe you have to become very resourceful on your own because your parents didn't care to help you as a child?

Maybe by being abused by someone, you are now working with helping others to deal with their own abuse situation and you are now their inspiration and motivation that they too can heal and move on with their lives.

Maybe by being deep in debt, you now have turned your life around and are helping others how to manage their money in a healthy way.

Maybe by being in a very bad relationship you have now learned why it didn't work and you are now assisting others who are trying to understand and work on their relationships.

So again, if you blame people and situations for the bad, you must also blame them for the good.


Tuesday, October 2, 2018

Some People Are Part Of Your History - Not Your Destiny

                                      "Letting go means to come to the realization 
                                           that some people are part of our history,
                                                            but not our destiny."
                                                             - Steve Maraboli

A couple of weeks ago I met with a dear friend for lunch.

After talking for a few minutes she said to me "It's amazing how much energy and how tiring it is to deal with relationships in our lives that are not working." 

So true. 
If we are unhappy in our intimate relationships, we are usually not happy at all. 
Unhappy and unfulfilling relationships will bleed over into all other areas of our lives. So it's very important to keep the relationships that are closes to us healthy. If not we will suffer greatly.

A lot of us have a tendency to hang onto relationships in our lives that have been over for years. Relationships that are actually weighing us down. We are afraid to be alone and scared that we will not be able to handle the situation. 
You know what you got - but you don't know what you will get.

                                                              If you want to fly,
                                  you have to get rid if what is  weighing you down.

If you have a spouse or partner that have grown apart, it might be time to let go and to move on?

If you are in a job where your boss is not supportive and there will never be any opportunities or growth, maybe it's time to let go and move onto something bigger and better?

Sometimes family members can weigh us down and it might be hard to walk away and let go because after all they are family.

Our friends can be a great source of happiness but also unhappiness. You might want to take a closer look at who you are spending most of your time with. 
As they say, you will become like the 5 people that you spend most of your time with.

Sometimes some people are so "messed up" that if you don't leave, it may rub off on you. 
Don't allow someone's disfunction to become your disfunction. 

Some people you just have to love from a distance. 

You might not have to walk away from people forever. 
But if they are constantly being negative, blaming you or others for their misery, angry, jealous, complaining all the might be time to take a closer look at what they are doing to you, and your relationship with them.

                              "Some people believe that holding on and hanging in there
                                                      are signs of great strength. 
                        However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know
                                                     when to let go and then do it."
                                                                 - Ann Landers

One thing that I have learned as I have gotten older is that some people will be in your life for a very short time. Some will stay a little longer. And then there are a few that will stay with you 
throughout your whole life.

The trick is to understand which ones are only here for a short time and which ones will stay forever. And then there are also some people that you should not allow into your life, even for a very short time.

                                                   Some people come into our lives
                                                         to teach us how to let go.


Monday, October 1, 2018

Failure Is Not The End

                                         "Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker.
                                                       Failure is delay, not defeat.
                                         It is a temporary detour, not a dead end.
                            Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, 
                                                doing nothing and being nothing."
                                                              - Dennis Waitly

A have come across a lot of people that are so afraid to fail that they don't even try some thing new.
Even if it will expand and improve the quality of their life.

Someone told me once....."If I don't try, it means that I didn't fail. I just say that I didn't feel like trying this particular thing because it wasn't worth an effort or a chance, and after all I wasn't really interesting in trying it anyway. So If I don't try, I cannot fail.....right?"

What do you think?

Are you so afraid of trying something new, even though you would like to, but you talk yourself out of it because you are afraid that you will look foolish or stupid?
Or it might be too much pain and uncertainty involved and you don't like the feeling of not having total control. How about rejection?

Is rejection failure?
Maybe you are being rejected personally or maybe the product/services that you are selling are not doing well.
Being rejected can be an awful feeling, but you can also think of rejection as a form of protection and re-direction.
Maybe your rejection isn't failure? Maybe it's moving you in a direction of something bigger and better that you couldn't see at the moment that you felt like your rejection was a failure?

We don't always know what is around the corner. Maybe a force bigger than you knows something that you don't know? And this force is protecting and you moving you or re-directing you in a different direction than you wanted, but this new direction will actually lead you to a bigger and better opportunity for you?

Just remember this..... failure is not the final destination. It will never be the final destination unless you decide to quit.

Failure is actually a lesson, if you are open to learning what the lesson is here to teach you.

Failure can a lot of times be the greatest teacher.

                                          "Our greatest glory is not in never failing,
                                                  but in rising every time we fail."
                                                       Ralph Waldo Emerson your failures. Get up and get going and then fail some more.

Every time you fail it will bring you that much closer to success.

                                          "Failure is not the opposite of success;
                                                         it's part of success."
                                                       - Ariana Huffington

Try something new today. 
Something that that you have been wanting to try for a long time or short time.
If you fall, get up right away and try again.
Study the failure and ask yourself.....What can I learn from this? And how can I do it differently next time?
Know that the only failure lies in never trying at all.

You can do it......I believe in YOU!


Wednesday, September 26, 2018

The Best Investment That You Can Ever Make Is An Investmen In Yourself

                               "Investing in yourself is the best investment you will ever make.
                                                       It will not only improve your life,
                                       it will improve the life of all those around you."
                                                             - Robin S. Sharma

                             "Energy invested in your own success can never be wasted.
                                       Energy wasted in others can never be taken back."
                                                          - Shanna Rodriguez

                       The best investment that you can ever make is an investment in yourself.

We invest our time, money and energy in a lot of people and on a lot of things. Some work out and some don't.

But there is one investment that will always work out and that is an investment in yourself.
Not only is it going to improve your own life and make you feel better. It will also help and improve the lives of the people around you.

Here are a few great investment that you can start making TODAY.
There is no risk involved and a big return is guaranteed.
Pick the ones you like the best and then start making the investments.

Invest in your health.
Most people don't even make time for their health until they start to feel bad. Don't wait on this one. Having a healthy body is very important. Your body is the only place that you've got to live. Treat it with great care and a lot of kindness.
Pay attention what you eat. Choose foods that are good for you and that will give you energy.

Invest in an exercise routine.
You don't have to spend hours at the gym or run miles and miles on the treadmill.
The exercise that will work best for you is the exercise that you will actually do. A variety of exercises might be the best. That way you won't get bored and you will also exercise all parts of your body. A brisk walk is a great way to get outdoors and get your body going.

Invest in a meditation routine.
You don't have to sit on the floor with your legs crossed chanting some strange words, unless you like doing that. You can turn on some soothing music and sit back in a chair for a few minutes and relax.
I lay down on the floor with my 2 dogs for 15 minutes every night before I go to bed. I call it "snuggle time." It's my meditation time and my dogs love it. It is very relaxing. I believe you can substitute dogs for cats or any other animal that you prefer.

Invest in your mind.
Read books and articles, listen to webinars and podcasts, join some discussion groups. Do something on a daily base that will expand your mind. Something that will make your grow. When we grow and learn new things it will actually increase our own happiness. Either we grow or we die, so get busy living by exercising your mind.

Invest in relaxation and reflection.
Take some time to just sit back and relax. Give yourself a little time to just breath. Take some time every evening and reflect back on the day. What was good and what was not so good and what can you improve on for the future. Taking time to reflect on what didn't go so well will assist you in making better decisions in the future. Same thing goes for what you did well. In the future do more of that.

Invest in feeling grateful.
A grateful mind is a happier mind. Sit down and count your blessings. Be grateful of what you've got and more things to be grateful will enter your life. There are so many things to be grateful for. Both big and small.

Invest your time in the right relationships.
We become like the people that we surround ourselves with. Who are you investing your time in?. Make sure these people are supportive and growth-minded.
So you might want to take a look at the people around you. What are they doing to you? And is that OK?
Stay in touch with friends and family. Get together in person. Call them up. Show them that you care. Don't just email and text.

Invest in your dream(s)
Always have a vision for your life. A vision that you decided was your own. Not what your parents, siblings, spouse, friends, teachers or your kids want. What do you want? What is your dream for your life? Who do you want to become? What do you want to do? Where do you want to live? Where do you want to travel to?

Invest in your hobbies.
Invest some of your time in doing things that you love to do. Maybe an art class, dance class, cooking class, learn a new language. Take some time to relax and do something that you love to do.
Very relaxing and so much fun!

Invest time in laughing and having fun.
No explanation needed. Some of us quit having fun. We have stopped doing things that are enjoyable and fun. Time to change that.
What makes you laugh and giggle? Find out and do it!


Monday, September 24, 2018

Your Body Is Your Business

                                    "So many people spend their health gaining wealth,
                              and then have to spend their wealth regaining their health."
                                                         - A. J. Reb Materi

                                           "Health isn't valued until sickness comes."
                                                             - Thomas Fuller

I am sure that you have heard that your thoughts will create your reality?
I truly believe this and I  have written many blogs about this subject.
In other words..... "You Are What You Think."

It's the mind - body connection.
What you think about, you will feel in your body.

But it's also true for the opposite, the body - mind connection...…"You Are What You Eat."

What we eat will totally affect how we feel in our bodies.
It will affect our energy level, our mood and also illnesses that we attracting and are struggling with.

There is a connection between what we eat and how we feel.
Food is a powerful regulator of our biology.

In today's world a lot of us are eating really "crappy" food. Some of what you eat.....I'm not sure that you can even call it food!!! 
A lot of processed foods, a diet filled with sugar, bad fats, caffeine and alcohol.

Eating these kinds of food will eventually lead to all sorts of problems down the road.

Have you ever thought  about how you are feeling can be related to what you are eating?

If you are not feeling good and if you are running low on energy, don't you want to know why?

It's not normal to walk around feeling bloated all the time. Or to have constant body aches. Or to feel sluggish and low on energy. Or to have brain fog and getting forgetful.

Do you want to feel healthier?

Your body is your business. Why are you not feeling good?

You know, the body and your brain has an amazing capacity to heal, regenerate and revitalize at any age.

Isn't it time to start optimizing your health? Start to plan your health.

Most people don't even think about what they are going to eat or how they are going to exercise.
The majority of people ignore little simple things that they can do to plan their health and wellbeing.

Unfortunately it's not an area that many people focus on.
The truth is, it's not going to happen by itself. You have design your life to create health.

It's not that much time and it won't take a lot of work, but you must build a structure and a system so that you can optimize your health and feel good all the time.

Time to remove things that are not good for you and add things that are amazing and healing.

Doing this will improve everything in your life from your personal relationships to your business.
It will make you feel better about yourself and give you tons of energy.

Today.....what are some simple things that you can start doing to create some better health for yourself and for your family?

What do you need to stop doing? 

What do you need to start doing?


Tuesday, September 18, 2018

What You Put Up With - You End Up With

                                     "You teach people how to treat you by what you allow,
                                               what you stop and what you reinforce."
                                                               - Tony Gaskin

                                                    "If I am not good to myself,
                                       how can I expect anyone else to be good to me."
                                                             - Maya Angelou

We are never responsible for another person's behavior. We don't have control over what they say and do.

But we do have control over our own reaction.

So if a person in your life isn't treating you with the respect that you deserve, you might want to make a few decisions.

Do you want the behavior from this person to continue?
Or do you want to do something about it?

If you do want to make a change, you might first want to take a look at yourself and I doing something to trigger this behavior in this person?
Or why am I allowing this behavior to continue without me saying STOP!

By not doing anything about the situation, says something about you.
Why are you allowing this person to continue to disrespect you?

Maybe you are afraid that if you speak your mind this person doesn't want to be friends with you anymore?

If you start saying "NO" to a person that you are romantically involved with, you might fear that the person will walk away from the relationship. So to remain in the relationship you will tolerate that he/she disrespects you.

You are afraid to speak up at work or in a meeting, because you fear that might loose your job or that your co-workers won't like you?

Or maybe you might even enjoy feeling wronged, because then you will have a story to tell everyone?

There is a payoff in everything that we do.

But if you want change...… if you want to see a different result, then you need to teach people how to treat you.

You have control over you.
This is great because now you are the one who has been allowing others to disrespect you, but now you can change that.

                                                      "I teach people how to treat me
                                                              by what I will allow."
                                                                 - Stephen Covey

Is it time to examine what you tolerate?


Monday, September 17, 2018

How To Stop Running Those Negative Tapes In Your Mind

                             "The subconscious mind is our habits and learned behavior.
                                    The conscious mind is creative and connected to our 
                                                     personal identity and to spirit."
                                                              - Dr. Bruce Lipton

We have about 50-60 thousands thoughts per day. 
Those thought are mostly negative and they are often the same thoughts that we had yesterday, the day before, last week and last year. 

We get stuck in an automatic thinking pattern and a lot of times the thoughts and the beliefs that we have adopted are not even out own. They were given to us by other people but now that are part of who we are and who we have become. 

That is why it is said that you shouldn't believe your own thoughts because they are probably not even your own thoughts. 

They might be thoughts and beliefs that your parents gave you, your siblings, teachers, society, spouses and friends.
Unfortunately we get programmed with a lot of negative thinking patters by our parents. 
They meant well but they didn't know better because they were also given programs by their parents and others.

No wonder that we sometimes wonder why we think, say and do the things that we do, because as it turns out it isn't us, and the way we think. 
It is our programming, given to us by others.

Most of our programming is negative. Almost 75%. And it was given to us before the age of seven. Great start in life!!! 

Did you ever say to yourself when you were younger that you never wanted to ever become like your mom or your dad, and later in life you discovered that you act and speak exactly just like them? 

You might not recognize it yourself, but your friends see it and they tell you. Of course you don't believe them because you swore that you would never become like your dad. But after paying a little more attention to what you say, do and think, you realize that you are just like your dad.

95% of our day is our automatic programming (subconscious mind). It is running the show in our life. And the rest of the day only 5% our conscious mind is in charge.

So 95% of the time old programming or old tapes are running our lives. Programming that has been done basically by others.

What can we do about this?

First we must become aware of our programming. Take an inventory of what tapes we are playing.

If you are constantly telling yourself that you are a loser, that you will never have healthy relationships, be happy in life, be able to make enough money, find the right person to marry, have friends that are supportive..... these recording won't you help accomplish great things on the outside. 
If the inside is running old and negative tapes, the outside will follow. 
The wrong recordings or programming might keep you from shining in life.

People that have said things to you often have their own issues. If you believe what they are saying and doing, their issues now have become, your issues.
Stop believing what certain people say and what that have said. 
Stop planting lies in your mind.

As an adult we can decide what we want to believe is the truth and what isn't. As children up to the age of seven, we didn't. 
We accepted everything as the truth.

Stand guard at the door of our own mind. Only let things in that you believe and think is true. Questions things. Just because a certain person said it was true, doesn't mean that it is true. Decide for yourself.

Instead of running old negative programs, you have to deliberately change that programming to something that will empower you.

Make some declaration that will support you, encourage you and help you succeed in life.

Work on your inner parts. 
Start in the morning. When you get dressed, brush your teeth, put on make-up....add a little inner work to your morning routine. 
Decide on some declarations that you find encouraging and powerful. 
Repeat throughout the day.

Keep on doing this and you will discover that your old programming and those old tapes are changing.

But you can't just do it once in a while. Every day is recommended. 

If you think it's too hard..... just remember how much you run those negative tapes all day long, with no effort. 
Just change out the content of those thoughts. Make them positive instead of negative. 
The effort is the same.

We don't have control over much in our lives, but we do have control over our own thoughts.

Start today and challenge your own thoughts and beliefs.

Awareness is key. 
Pay attention to your thoughts. 
Write some of them down on a piece of paper and then ask yourself.....

Is this my belief? 
Do I really believe this?
Is this my own thought or someone else's thought?


Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Break Free From A Painful Past

                                         Let go of the past, let go of the painful memories.
                                                    Don't miss your chance of creating 
                                                     beautiful memories for tomorrow.

Why do a lot of us have a tendency to hold on to the past?

Why do we allow painful experiences not only to influence us but also to control our future?

What would life look like if we were able to make peace with those painful experiences and let them go?

Isn't it time to shed some of those old stories that are weighing us down and often wreck havoc in our lives?

Isn't it time to let go?

                                                       "Pain is inevitable.
                                                     Suffering is optional."
                                                       M. Kathleen Casey

So take some time to ponder on these questions...……

What would my life look like if I let go of the old stories and the pain from my past? 

What would happen if I let go of things that has been holding me back for years, maybe even decades?

What would happen if I believe that what is in front of me is bigger and better than what is behind me?

The painful memories from the past will continue to have power over us, if you are not able to let it go. 
We will stay attached to the pain with energetic chords.
And sometimes those painful experiences might even become part of our identity.

Are you living in a story of pain and suffering?

Is it time to break free from the past so that you can have a beautiful life?

                                        Pain makes you stronger, tears make you braver
                                                   and heartbreak makes you wiser,
                                                 so thank the past for a better future.


Monday, September 10, 2018

What Is Success To You?

                                                 "The secret of success is this:
                                                  there is no secret to success."
                                                         - Elbert Hubbard

What does success look like to you?

What exactly is success?

Is there a model for success?

I believe that success is the progress of you and your own personal goals.
Goals that were designed by YOU.
Not goals that were imposed on you by society, your parents, your spouse, friends or anyone else.

Success is not an amount of money, living in a certain kind of house in a certain neighborhood, wearing the latest designer clothes, driving the latest model car, taking expensive vacations to foreign destinations around the world.
This doesn't have anything to do with success.

Success is the steady progress of you and toward your goals.

The person you want to be.

Your business goals, personal goals, family goals, health goals and spiritual goals.

The goal that gives you satisfaction.

The goal that gives you purpose, meaning and joy.

My definition of success can be very different from yours.

So there is no one definition of success.

No one size fits all.

Can't defines success by the latest #1 book on the best seller list.

"Success is not in what you have,
but who you are."
- Bo Bennet

"The path to success is to take massive, determined action."
- Anthony Robbins

"Success is finding meaning in what you do."
- Anonymous

"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do,
and liking how you do it."
- Maya Angelou

Success is not some kind of stereotype. 
There is no one model.
There is no one set way.
There is no one size fits all.
There is only YOUR way.

What is success to you?
Take some time to think about this question.

Leave me a comment in the box below and let me know what success is to you.


Wednesday, September 5, 2018

Every Act Counts No Matter How Small

                                                "There is no giant step that does it.
                                                        It's a lot of little steps."
                                                             - Peter A Cohen

                                                   "Great things are done by a
                                           series of small things brought together."
                                                         - Vincent Van Gogh

As I look as those quotes I reflect back on my own life and especially my own coaching business that I started back in 2012.

These quotes make a lot of sense to me..... and now I will tell you why

Today I am writing blog number 500. Wow....pretty amazing!!!

If you would have told me back in 2014 that I would write blogs for my business and 500 during the next four years....I would have told you that you were insane and that it was no way that I could do that. 
At that time I had only written some short post on FB and a few newsletters…..
what would I write about?

Come to find out.....  I really enjoy writing, and I have a lot of things to write about and share with others.

And not only have I written all these blogs I have now also written three books. Two are already published and the third will be published this month.

No giant step will ever do it, but a lot of small steps will.

Nothing worthwhile is happening overnight. There is no overnight success. No quick fixes will ever accomplish something important in our life.
It takes a lot of work on a daily base if we want to accomplish our goals.

I talk to a lot of people that would like to write a book but they feel overwhelmed by the whole idea, because they don't know where to start. They feel overwhelmed by having to write a lot.

I always suggest to them to start small.
Write a few things on FB or other social media. Then start a blog. Once you have written for a while it will be a lot easier to tackle a larger goal, like writing a book.

A little bit of writing will eventually lead to bigger writing. Nothing happens overnight. You must practice and practice and practice.

Most people want the end result but they seldom want to prepare for it.
Or they feel so overwhelmed by the enormity of the project that they don't even take the first step.

Every journey starts with one single step.

You must start or nothing will happen.

Then you must practice.....practice.....practice.

Eventually you will get to where you want to go and when you do..... you must celebrate your accomplishment.

So today I pat myself on the back and say......Well Done, Karin!!!


Monday, September 3, 2018

You Don't Have To Be Happy All The Time

                                              "Be who you are and say what you feel,
                                                 because those who mind don't matter
                                                   and those who matter don't mind."

You don't have to be positive and happy all the time.

There is so much pressure to be happy and positive, no matter what.

It's perfectly okay to feel sad, angry, stressed, disappointed, annoyed, frustrated, scared and anxious sometimes.

Having theses kinds of feelings doesn't make you a "negative" person. 

It makes you human.

Feel those feelings.

Recognize that these feelings are important.

And remember......that you are not alone in having these kind of feelings.

                                      When you start suppressing feelings at an early age,
                                                       it hurts you down the road.

A couple of months ago I was watching and interesting interview on TV. Two financial coaches were talking to a 31-year old man that had gotten himself into a big mess. He was in deep debt. Almost two hundred and fifty thousand dollars in debt, to be exact.
Of course one of the first questions that was asked could this have happened?
Come to find out that this man had trouble dealing with his emotions. When he didn't feel happy and positive, he shopped. He bought things left and right. Online and off line. He had things everywhere in his small apartment and he had a storage unit filled with stuff that was still in their boxes.
This guy couldn't handle not feeling happy and positive all the time so he used shopping as a "quick fix" to feel better. And now he was deep in debt.

Some people shop to avoid their feelings. Some people gamble. Others engage in relationship-hopping and sex. Others drink and some do drugs. Another group of people work all the time.

There is also a group of people that are always trying to be nice and likable.
Do you know someone that no matter what, they are always smiling and they always say that they are doing great?

Suppressing your emotions can cause you to have health problems later in life.

                                                  Never suppress your emotions. 
                                             Emotions are like water - let them flow. 
                    If you suppress them they will become stagnant and will cause disease, 
                                                       like stagnant water does.


Wednesday, August 29, 2018

We Are Each Responsible For Our Own Life

                                              "We are each responsible for our own life,
                                                    no other person is or can ever be."
                                                                      - Oprah

As human beings we have a tendency to take responsibility for the good things that happened in our lives and we blame unfavorable things on others or circumstances.

Do you know any person that likes to blame their misery or failures on someone else?

I am sure you do. Or maybe you are that person that is usually blaming someone else or you blame circumstances when things go wrong in your life?

My boss makes me miserable. My parents did not support me when I was a kid. My brother beat me up all the time when we were growing up . The economy is to blame for my financial problems. My spouse is never there for me. My kids drive me crazy.

Throughout my life I have met many men and women who are still grumbling and complaining about earlier unhappy experience in their lives. They are blaming their problems on other people and circumstances. They are angry with parents, siblings, bosses, ex-spouses, children and friends. And when they talk about the past you can see that they are still fuming over these people.
Unfortunately these people are trapped in the past and they can't get free. They are living behind invisible prison doors.

The problem is that every time you blame someone else or make excuses, you are giving away your power. You automatically get weakened and diminished.
If you are not able to take personal responsibility, no progress is possible and you will remain stuck where you are.

                             "The choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility."
                                                             - Eleanor Roosevelt

Accept total responsibility for your life and you will be amazed what a difference it will make.
Set yourself free by letting go of blame.

I know there are times when our lives are significantly influenced by outside forces. Like losing a job due to downsizing or poor economy
I also know that there are a lot of really bad people out there doing really bad things, but blaming someone or something that happened to you isn't going to help you. Actually you will remain attached to this person for the rest of your life if you don't stop talking about them and  stop blaming them. You will remain a prisoner in a prison that you have created yourself.

If the problem is poor personal relationships, addiction, poor health, overspending, joblessness or excess weight..... the minute you say....I am reclaim your own power.

People might have been really bad to you and caused you a lot of pain. Your parents were really bad role models, your ex-spouse was abusive to you. Yes, at this time you were a victim and it wasn't your fault. But it's up to you to do something about the situation. Remaining a victim won't create change.
You have the power to take responsibility for what actions you choose to take. It's when you focus on what you can do and how you should act that you gain power.

                                                   "Accept responsibility for your life. 
                            Know that it is you who will get you where you want to go,
                                                                    no one else."
                                                                    - Les Brown


Monday, August 27, 2018

Stress Less - Weigh Less

                                                    "The greatest weapon against stress is
                                            our ability to choose one thought over another."
                                                                  - William James

Nothing is permanent.
Don't stress yourself too much because no matter how bad the situation will change.

Do you feel like you are a victim of your hurry and worry lifestyle? 
Here are a few practices to optimize your mind, spirit and your body. 
It only takes one idea to change your life and today I will give several ideas that you can implement to your life to feel better right away.

Change Out Toxic and Dis-Empowering Thoughts.

It all starts with your own thoughts. Whatever your thoughts are your body will follow. Whatever you are thinking you will feel in your body, whether it is true or not. Your mind is very powerful and you have to make sure that you use it the right way.
Unfortunately toxic thoughts are everywhere and we've all got them. My questions to you much do you believe your own toxic thoughts?
Positive people don't buy into those toxic thoughts instead they turn those negative thoughts into allies.

How do we do this?
First have the courage to identify and describe the toxic belief you have about yourself, another person or a situation. I always recommend to get the thought and belief out of your head and put it on a piece of paper and then confront the belief.
Ask this really the truth? 

Now when you have identified the negative thought it's time to re-phrase that thought or belief into a positive phrase or statement instead.

Finally, repeat the newly claimed positive statement or phrase over and over again until you feel it to be true.
It will take some effort but it will work.

Stop Worrying
Worrying is a waste of your precious time. Worrying is stressful and it increases the body's production of cortisol. Cortisol is a stress hormone and we don't want to increase it in the body by worrying excessively. 
Instead focus on how to decrease your stress level. 

Ask yourself.....what can I do to reduce the stress in my life?
Take all the time and the energy that you used to put into worrying and put it into finding some great exercises that can help you relieve some of the stress.
Overthinking only complicates your life. Think less to limit stress.

Eat Right

There are plenty of food that can stress and inflame your system which will cause your body to bloat, retain fluids and it can also create a variety of allergic reactions. 
A few example of foods to limit or completely stay away from. Processed and refined foods, food high in sugar or sodium, caffeine, alcohol. 

You might also want to get some blood work done to see what specific foods you might be allergic to in an effort to decrease the inflammatory response that food can have on the immune system.
(I am allergic to gluten and I stay away from it all the time because it will upset my digestive system and cause bloating and other uncomfortable symptoms in my body).

Eat a healthy diet of vegetables and fruits, whole grains, healthy fats, nuts and fish.
Stay away from any food that will leave your body inflamed.


Most of us know that doing some kind of exercise on a daily base is an important component in feeling good and also in shedding unwanted pounds.
One thing that I believe is that you have to find some kind of exercise that you enjoy doing, or it will be difficult for you to maintain the habit.

Find a workout buddy is another way to keep yourself on track. Especially in the beginning when motivation and willpower might be in short supply.
Keep a workout journal to keep yourself on track.

Don't be a "weekend hero" at the gym either. Doing this might be setting yourself up for some kind of physical injury and you end up on the couch recuperating for several weeks.
Stress the body just enough so that the body adapts to higher degrees of performance.


A good night sleep will help your body to regenerate, rebuild and restore.
Develop a good sleep hygiene. Dark and cold bedroom, no electronics, don't exercise right before bedtime and don't eat or drink anything before you go to bed. Stay away from alcohol. It has a tendency to help you feel relaxed and sleepy but in a couple of hours it will wake you up and it will then keep you awake.
Have some kind of sleep routine before you go to be. Examples of this can be.....

A gratitude journal or any kind of journal.
Some kind of mediation that will work for you.( I mediate with my two dogs for 15 minutes right before bedtime. We call it "Snuggle Time" and we all three love it.)
Listen to some calm and relaxing music.
Read a book
Here - come up with your own______________________________

Learn To Say NO

It's OK to say NO to requests for your time.
A lot of people are stressed because they are overextending themselves and they will constantly walk around with a feeling over overwhelm.
You can do it all, but you don't have to do it all. If you identify with this it's time to get to know the power of "NO".

Learn to put yourself first. I know this is hard for many people, especially women that have grown accustoms to putting the family's needs above their own. But we must realize that we are not good to others if we are worn out all the time and out of touch with ourselves, our health, vitality and passion.
Learn to set boundaries when it comes to giving away your time too freely. Yes, I know that it takes courage to start putting your foot down and in the beginning. Some people might get upset with you, especially if you have been a "YES" person for a long time.
But in the end they will respect you for standing up for yourself.

When you start taking care of yourself you start feeling better, you start looking better and you also start to attract better.


Never underestimate the power of a smile.
When you smile it will automatically change the vibration in your body. Smiling will make you feel great. If you haven't used your smile for a's time to bring it out again and start using it. The more you use it, the better you will feel and other people around will start to respond positively to you. Use your smile often because you can never run out of smiles.

Everyone is equipped with a smile. If you meet someone without a smile, give them one of yours.
Never leave your home without one and don't forget to bring one home with you.

Hugs are great too. A hug is guaranteed to lower you stress level right away and it will give you a warm feeling of wellbeing. It will make you feel like everything will be just fine.

Try some of these easy solutions.
You can implement them right away to curb your stress and melt off excess pounds.