"One of the best lessons you can learn in life,
it to remain calm."
- Catherine Pulsifer
Have you ever paid attention to animals out in nature when they fight?
Most of the time the fighting only last for a short period of time. Probably only a few seconds. When birds are through fighting they move away from each other, shake their bodies, flap their wings and then they move on.
Same things when dogs or cats fight. It might sound bad when they are rolling around on the ground, showing their teeth and growling, but most of the time it's over with in a matter of seconds and then they get up, shake their bodies and move on.
Animals don't hold a grudge. They don't plan to get even with the animal that started the fight. They are not gossiping and posting mean and hurtful words on Facebook. They don't gossip and try to sabotage for other animals.
What do they do? The fight quickly, shake it off and then they move on.
What do we humans do?
The opposite. We hang onto anger, resentment, jealousy, bitterness for a very long time. For some people, maybe their whole life.
"My parents did me wrong, so I will never forgive them for what they did." or "My spouse treated me like crap, so I will talk bad about him/her every chance that I get. And I don't care who listens. Every person that I met for the rest of my life, will know what I bad husband/wife, he/she was.
I will show him/her."
I believe we have a lot to learn from the animals. We must learn to let things go. And the sooner we can do this, the better off we are. But instead of acting like the animals we hang onto things forever and that will eventually wreck havoc in our own lives.
We allow other people and the world to disturb our peace.
Have you ever paid attention to the waves of the ocean.
They come in all sizes and sometimes when there is a storm going on, the waves are huge. But if you go below the surface just a little bit, you will discover that there is always calm there. If we can learn to just remain there in the calm water, just below the surface when upsetting things, other people's drama and the chaos in the world is going on, we will feel so much better. And in the end we will have happiness, freedom and peace of mind.
But what do most of us do? We just jump straight into the water and the waves. The problem with this approach is that most people don't know how to surf and the waves will constantly keep on knocking them over.
This is an exhausting way to live. Being reactive all the time. It will wear you completely out. You will waste a lot of precious mental energy that can be used for something better, like pursuing your vision, for example.
One reason why I think that having a vision for our life is a must, is that I will actually work like a giant magnet. It will pull us through thinking and spending too much of our time in the past. And it will also help us with the every day distraction that are pulling us sideways.
What do I mean by distractions. Other people's agenda, the chaos in the world, people's drama and their craziness. If you keep on focus on these things, the distractions from the past and also the distractions form the world and other people, it will be hard for you to reach your destiny. What you're meant to do on this earth.
A few weeks ago a got off track and ended up in the ditch, as I call it.
I had gotten involved with a little bit of drama from another person, which I allowed to disturb my own peace of mind. I allowed it to get in the way of where I was going.
You know our own mind can sometimes hijack us. Well I have to admit that my own thoughts hijacked me that day and allowed my mind to take me to a place where I really didn't want to go. I allowed myself to get in the middle of the waves in the ocean, without knowing how to surf.
It is a good way to drown in your own "stinking thinking."
Later in the day, I was talking to a great friend and confidant about what had happened and she told me a story about when she was young and allow the actions of her boyfriend to disturb her peace of mind. Actually she couldn't sleep for one night and she told me that the next morning she made an agreement with herself, to not to ever allow the little stuff, that is actually not that important, to ever disrupt her sleep again. It really wasn't that big of a deal.
Later, I was talking to another good friend of mine, but I didn't not tell her what had happened during the day and she was basically telling me the same thing, never sweat the little stuff. Learn to let it go quickly.
And then a few hours later, the same day I was watching my dog Lady, chewing on a piece of rawhide on the floor. At the same time another dog was running back and forth in front of her, just barking up a storm. But the neat thing was that Lady didn't even look up. She didn't allow this dog to disturb her peace and her enjoying chewing on that bone.
So I told myself....."Wow, my own dog is better than me at not allowing the little stuff to bother her." Amazing.....I must learn from her.
Both my friends told me not to let the little stuff, that really isn't between me and my destiny to affect me. In other words.....it wasn't important and I was making a big thing out of something small. I allowed my own brain to take me for a big ride.
So I have decided that I need to work on being in the calm water below the surface of the ocean.
I must stop reacting and stay out of the choppy waters as much as I can.
Does this sound familiar to you?
Do you spend a lot of time in choppy water, but you don't know how to either swim of surf? I believe a lot of us do. We are more reactive instead of just responding and then shake it off as quickly as possible.
In this area we have a lot to learn from the animals. Your own peace of mind is the most valuable thing that you have. Don't allow other people's drama and the chaos of the world to take you down on a undesirable path.
(Here is a blog a wrote a while back..... react vs respond)
We have the power to choose our own thoughts.
We also have the power to react or to just simply respond and then release. It's totally up to us.
We mustn't allow the actions of the world and the actions of other people to hijack our brain. I know …….sometimes it's easier said than done, but with some practice we can remain in the calm waters below the surface and simply decide to respond and walk away.
That way we will conserve our energy for more important battles and storms in our lives. The battles that are worth fighting for. But if the battle isn't between you and your destiny, let it go. Because if you get involved in it, you might even miss your destiny.
Stay on your path and stay in the calm water, below the surface.