Monday, June 29, 2020

Life Is Defined By The Choices You Make

                                                   "Life is a matter of choices,
                                        and every choice you make makes you."
                                                        - John C. Maxwell

Everything in our life exists because we first made a choice about something. We end up with the life that is an accumulation of the choices that we have made, throughout our life. Good choices as well as bad choices.
Every choice or decision we make is going to have an effect on our life. Nothing is neutral. Either it leads us in the right direction or the wrong direction of what we want to accomplish and where we want to go.

Our choices can be our best friend..... or our worst enemy.
Our choices can get us on the right path to achieving our goals or it can derail us and put us far away from our desired destination.

Every decision or choice that we make will start a behavior, that eventually will lead to forming a habit.
There are productive and empowering habits that will take us in the right direction. And there is also the opposite. Bad habits will take us down the wrong path and away from our destiny.
Choose poorly and we might find ourselves back where we started many years ago and now we are faced with making even harder choices.

Sometimes we don't choose at all. We decide that deciding is too scary so we simply ignore making a choice or a decision. Do you think that not making a choice or a decision is safe? Think again! If you don't make a choice or a decision and you are passive..... you will probably receive whatever comes your way. Is that what you truly want?

Every decision that you make, no matter how small will alter the direction of your life.
First you make the choices..... than the choices make you.

                                               "Choices are the hinges of destiny."
                                                           - Edwin Markham

Don't allow your choices to be unconscious. Become aware of what you are choosing and deciding on a daily basis so you won't end up somewhere you didn't want to go in the first place. Awareness is key so that you can decide on the right choices, behaviors and habits that will empower you and lead you down the path to your destiny.

Today become conscious of your choices and habits.
Ask yourself.....
What am I doing that I didn't consciously decide to do?
Why do I continue to do this?

If something is leading you in the wrong direction, you must push the PAUSE button before you are on your way in the opposite direction of where you want to go.

Make sure that you make decisions and create habits that will support you and lead you in the direction that you have chosen for your life.
Your biggest challenge will be to wake up and start making conscious choices and decisions.

Here is great question for your to ponder on today!
What are the choices that are leading you away from your desired destination?
Examine the choices you have made.
Examine your habits.
Write it all down.

It's all about becoming aware of your choices that you have made in the past. The choices that you are not happy with and that did not lead you in the right direction, so that starting
TODAY you can change, and make better and more empowering choices and decisions for your future.

                                    "Your life changes the moment you make a new, 
                                            congruent, and committed decision."
                                                               - Tony Robbins 

                                             Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach


Monday, June 22, 2020

What Is Stinking Up Your Life?

                                            "The first step to getting what you want 
                                is to have the courage to get rid of what you don't want."
                                                               - Zig Ziglar

Today I am writing about the stinky stuff in our lives.

Most of us have some stinky stuff going on in our lives. Some have more and some have less.
I have had a lot of stinky stuff in my life, and I am working on slowly eliminating most of the bad smelling stuff in my own life. It's not always easy and it will require some action, effort and consistency.
We have to constantly be on the watch out for stinky stuff around us and making sure that it doesn't get in the way of us living a happy and fulfilling life. A little stinky..... we can deal with. But it's the huge stinky..... like full-blown emergencies and crisis, that will be a little more difficult to handle and that will take a lot of our energy.

Have you ever opened the door to your refrigerator  and smelled something stinky?
I think that most of us have.

What do we usually do when we open the door to the refrigerator and we smell something stinky? Most of us will probably look around a little bit. Maybe we move a few items around trying to figure out where the smell is coming from, and when we can't see it, we just shut the door hoping that the smell will disappear by itself.
Does this sound like you?

The next day it is still stinky but since it isn't any worse than it was the day before, we simply ignore it again, believing that it will probably be gone by tomorrow or maybe some else will figure it out and clean it up so we don't have to.

This goes on for a couple of days, but by the time next week rolls around the smell is so bad that it can't be ignored.

We look in the vegetable drawer and find some "not so fresh" looking veggies and we decide to remove them in order to get rid of the smell. We are now sure that this will fix the problem.

But it didn't. And the smell is really getting bad by now. It cannot be ignored anymore. And since no one else seemed to be bothered by the smell we finally decide that we have to look a little closer.

We find some meat that doesn't look to fresh, and we quickly remove it. Thinking that the meat was the problem.

No, it didn't fix it either. The fridge is really stinking now. So we finally have to take the time to empty out the whole refrigerator to figure out what is going on.

After almost everything has been removed we discover some really old fish on the bottom shelf under a lot of other things. It was hidden and we didn't move the things in front of it nor did we remove things on top of it to, discover the rotten and stinky fish.

We throw away the fish. Clean out the whole refrigerator, and guess what.....the stinky smell is gone.
We finally figured out what was stinking up the refrigerator. The fish.

So my question there something stinking up your life right now?

How about your health and wellbeing?
Are you taking great care of your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health?
Or are you ignoring it, thinking it will take care of itself without you paying any attention to it?
Are you feeding your body and your mind excellent fuel for it to operate on? Or do you mostly feed it junk?
Are you ignoring the signs of high blood pressure or high blood sugar levels thinking that it won't turn it something worse, like a stroke or maybe diabetes?
Are you sleeping enough? Are you drinking enough water on a daily basis?
Are you using sleeping pills to be able to go to sleep? Are you taking pills to relax or pills to get yourself going every day?
Are you drinking alcohol in order to be able to relax?
Is your body and your mind slowly becoming toxic and stinky?

How about your relationships are they healthy and nurturing?
Or are still hang onto some toxic friends and family members because you are afraid of being alone? Are you spending time with people who aren't going anywhere in life? People that don't want to learn, grow and expand their lives? Are you hanging onto closeminded people that have settled in life and that are now becoming bitter and stinky?

How about your job....are you happy and fulfilled at work?
Or are you simply just getting through the day and waiting for the weekend to arrive? Do you feel that your skills are not being used at work and you feel understimulated and unmotivated?
Or is it the opposite? There is so much going on at work and you are highly stressed and feeling that you don't have time to finish everything during the day and you have to take it home with you and spend a couple of hours in the evening completing the work.? You know that if this continues you will eventually have to face burnout from working way to much. Your family is slowly getting unhappy at home because you don't have time to spend with them and when you do, you are frustrated, short tempered and angry. You now have a stinky mess on your hands both at work and at home.

How about your finances?
Are you spending all the money that you make and then some, every month?
Are you wasting money buying things to impress others? People that you actually don't like but you want them to think that you are successful? So you buy things hat you cannot afford, but it is a quick fix and it makes you feel and look good for the moment. Are you in debt, but you still buy stuff ? Do you still believe that a bigger car, a bigger house, a brand new pool in the backyard, the latest designer clothes or new electronics will make you feel significant and happy.
Are you gambling away your money, thinking that the next bet will make you a millionaire?
Are you using your money buying stinky things or behaving in a stinky way?

How about your thoughts?
Are you having a lot of "stinking thinking" going on?
You know, we don't have control over a lot of things in our lives, but we do have control over our mind and our own thoughts. We don't have to participate in negative thinking, gossiping, complaining or worrying. We can choose to stop stinking thinking with more empowering and inspiring thoughts. Thoughts that will actually give us hope and empower instead of breaking us down.

Sometimes we need to stop and smell the stinky in our own lives.
Where in your own life do you have a lot of stinky going on?
Is there some area(s) that need to be checked on and maybe cleaned out?
Are you simply ignoring the smell and hoping that it will go away by itself?
Are you waiting for someone else to clean up the mess?

Why wait until something gets so bad that you are forced the face the really bad smell and then forced to clean it up.
Why not start a little earlier before the small stinky problem, becomes a huge full-blown stinky crisis?

Don't wait. If you can smell something stinky in your life. Stop and take a look at it. Acknowledge the smell and then take action right away. Don't wait, it won't smell any better tomorrow and it won't go away by itself, and most of the time no one else will fix it either.


Monday, June 15, 2020

Are You Willing To Do What It Takes To Change Your Life?

                             The opportunity for a better life ultimately comes down to you.
                                                  You must be willing to change.

You can't get in shape by watching other people workout or watching some kind of sport on TV. Watching people in the gym lifting weights, will not increase and strengthen  your muscles. You have to lift the wrights yourself. To get in any kind of better physical or mental shape, you actually have to do the "getting in shape" part yourself.
No one can do it for you.

A couple of weeks ago ran into a good friend of mine that I had not seen for over a year. We talked a while about was going on in our lives. I remembered that a couple of years she had mentioned to me that she had gone to see a chiropractor for her back problems, and right now I am looking for a good chiropractor, for myself. So I asked her about her experience with this chiropractor. If he was any good and if she felt that she got the help that she deeded?

Her response was that she thought he was okay, but in the end she didn't feel that he helped her a lot with a her problem. And beside that she said, it was pretty expensive to go and see him.
So I asked her if she would recommend him to others? And she stated that he was probably like most chiropractors and that he did and okay job.
Then she said, "well part of the problem that I didn't feel much better was that he gave me some exercises that I was suppose to do on a daily basis in order to get better, and I didn't do them.
So I am partly to blame for not getting to feel better."

Can you relate to this!!!

Here is a great example...…
You start on a new diet. You are excited for a while, convinced that this time you will be able to shed those stubborn 20 pounds that you have put on during the past 5 years. You follow the diet for a few weeks .You hit the gym several times per week, but when you don't see the instant results that you have hoped for, you get discouraged. You quit the diet and you blame the diet for not being a good one.
In a few months this starts all over again with a new diet and a new attempt to shed the pounds and getting in shape.

Here is another example.....
You have decided to get in better mental shape, reduce stress and become more mindful. You start reading all the self help books out there that you can get our hands on. But after a while you quit reading, because you don't feel like the books helped you become more inspired, enlightened and motivated and beside that you can't really see any huge difference in your own life, anyway.
But did you apply any of the tips, ideas that the books recommend that you had to do in order for your life to change?

How many courses or seminars have you attended live or online to learn, expand and grow?
Did you apply any of the tips, ideas and strategies that they recommended that you have to in order to accomplish what you wanted in your life?

Have you ever decided on a new goal, maybe a new financial goal or relationship goal? You went to the seminar, you read the books and articles. You discovered  brand new ways of doing things that would definitely help you in creating a better life for yourself and your family.
Did you apply what you learned, in your own life, or did you just decide that it wasn't for you?
Or did you decide that the course wasn't any good and you regret going and spending money on it?
The teacher, coach or the leader of the course wasn't any good and you already knew everything they did and taught?

Did you decide that the self-help books that you read was a waste of your time and those tips, ideas and strategies would never work in your life anyway, so why even bother trying to implement them in your own life and you decide that self-help books wasn't for you?

                                              If you're not willing to change,
                                       don't expect your life to change either.

In order for our lives to improve and get better, we have to do the work required. No one can do it for us.
You can read all the self help books out there, but if you don't apply what they tell you to do, all those books won't do you any good.

You can watch others play sports, walk, run or lift weights. But you won't get in shape simply by watching others exercise.

In the end it comes down to what are you willing to do in order to make your life better?
Sitting on the sidelines, glued to the TV, binge watching your favorite sitcom, constantly scrolling thought FB, checking your emails or talking on the phone, won't get you were you want to go.
But hard work will. Applying new ideas, tips and strategies will. Creating a vision for your life and setting goals will.

Are You Willing To Do What It Takes To Change Your Life?


Monday, June 8, 2020

Old Ways Won't Open New Doors

                                         The most dangerous phrase in the language is....
                                                   "we've always done it this way."

When your computer is slowing down and not functioning on the most effective level, it might need to take a step back, to download and update some new programs. Maybe it also it needs to get rid of a few viruses. To do this it will have to shut down for a period of time. It will be a waiting period before you can use your computer again. It will take different length of time depending on how many old programs that had to be removed, before it could do all the updating and re-loading of new programs.

When you finally turn on the computer after it has downloaded all the new programs or updated excising programs, it will sometimes feel awkward and frustrating because you can't find some of the old ways of doing things. You have to learn new ways. The old programs are not working the same way as they did before the update.
This means that you can't go back to the old way we did things on the computer before the new updates and downloads. You are forced to learn new ways of doing things.
In a way the computer has cleaned out the old to make room for the new. It also means that the new programs and updates will make your computer run more smoothly and it will be able to do things it couldn't do before. Maybe it also has more speed and capability.

Is this what is happening in the world?
The world was forced to slow down by this virus. The world was forced to take a step back. The world was forced into a period of waiting.
We couldn't do the things that we were used to do. Some people couldn't go to work. Some people had to work from home. Kids couldn't go to school. We couldn't meet our friends and family.
In other words, we couldn't do what we usually did. We were in a waiting period.

After this waiting period there will be a re-charging period and new things will be downloaded.
New ideas, new dreams, new perspectives and new opportunities.
We are being prepared to go somewhere where we have never been before. We are being prepared to accomplish new goals and dreams that we thought were impossible before.

The key is that we can't go back to doing the things the same was as we did before.
We must open our minds and our hearts for change, or the recharge is not going to work.

Are you making the most of your life?
Are you living the life of your choice, or are you living a life that someone else designed for you?
Are you pursuing your dreams, or maybe you need to dream a new dream?
Are you spending your time wisely?
Who are you spending your time with?
Are you spending time on a job that gives you purpose?
Have you outgrown some of your relationships?
Are you fulfilling your purpose?
Are you just going through the day, not excited, stuck in a job or in a relationship where you are not fulfilled?

Now is the time to make adjustments. Stay open for something new. What worked in the past, may not be good for right now and where you are going.

Don't get stuck in the old. It's time to re-focus.
Old ways can't open new door.

We must come out of this crisis with a new mindset. We must get a clear vision and we must learn to re-focus.
We must be open for new ideas. New job opportunities. New relationships and friendships. New open doors.
We must get out of our comfort zone and try new things.
We must letting go of old things and ways of doing things in order to discover new and more exciting ways.

Time to try new things.
Look for the new open doors and stop staring and hanging onto the old doors that are closing or have already closed.

It's easy to stay in the comfort zone. It's easy to get comfortable. But complacency will keep us stuck where we are right now and it will prevent us from accomplishing our dreams.

At this time we are being forced to move forward. Don't fight it. Move along instead.
Open your heart and your mind and start looking for new open doors, new opportunities, new dreams, new jobs and new friendships.

It's time for a new assignment. It's time for a new dream!!!

This is what happened to me back in 2012, when I had to go through the biggest crisis in my own life, so far. I had 3 huge losses in less than 4 months. Almost all doors closed around me and only one opened. But I took the open door because it was no use in hanging onto the shut doors. because they were not going to open again. I was also in a waiting period of  about 6 months before I came up with a new vision for my life. During this time I had to let go of a lot of old things and relationships in order to make room for new ones. It' was total uncertainty and most things and people around me were new.
Was this waiting time easy? Heck NO!!! I was scared to death!!!
But I also knew that the only things I could to was to stop fighting for things to go back to they way they used to be and to move forward. I couldn't  look back at my old life, because it was never ever going to be the same again.

But new ideas were born during this time. A new vision for my life was born  A new business was born. New relationships were born. New opportunities were born. A new mindset was born.

Today my life is very different. I have grown a lot. I have learned many new things. Accomplished huge goals. Met new people and created new relationships. I have done many scary things. I have faced my fears and I will continue to do this.

Is it time for a new assignment in your life?
Is it time for you to create a new dream?
Is it time for new ideas?

                                               Life is an amazing opportunity.
                                              Don't be afraid to try new things.


Monday, June 1, 2020

Losing Motivation

                                         "People often say that motivation doesn't last.
                      Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily."
                                                               - Zig Ziglar

I don't know about you, but I feel like I have lost some of my motivation during this past month.
I believe that a lot of people feel fatigued, a sense of burnout, overwhelm and stress right now due to the conditions around them. It feels like that we have lost motivation.

Or maybe we haven't lost motivation at all?
Maybe it's still there?
Maybe we just simply stopped doing the things that motivated us in the past?
Maybe we lost touch with our ideal future?
Maybe we put our dreams on hold?

Can we get our motivation back?
What can we do on a daily basis to get going, create momentum and feel motivated again?

Right now most of us are obsessed about the news, what is going on in the world, what is going to happen tomorrow, the inconveniences, the threats and social media. We are constantly paying attention and consuming what is in front of us instead of taking the time to shift our focus and visualize what could be instead. We have put our dreams on the backburner. In a way a lot of people have paused a lot of things to see how everything is going to turn out.

But instead we must get obsessed about our vison and our goals again. It's time to re-connect with our ideal future.
In other words, we need to activate our dreams again.

Motivation is actually triggered by ambition or having a burning desire and action.

If you want to have a better life, better and more fulfilling relationships, a better job, a healthy body, a balanced lifestyle, peace of mind, more happiness, more joy, more love and abundance in any area of your life...that is ambition or a burning desire.

Your minds need more that simply surviving the day. It needs to be engaged in something that will create your ideal future. Something that will make you grow, expand, thrive, or you will loose motivation.
You need to make positive progress every single day.

Here are a few tips to get your motivation going again!

Connect With Your Dream. 
It's really important that you don't loose your connection to your ideal future.
Write down your vision and your goals. Create ways to achieve your dream.
Do some brainstorming.
Visualize your ideal future.
Write down some action steps for you to take.
Take action on a few steps every single day.

Create A Morning Routine.
Take a least 30 minutes every morning to connect with your vision or dream.
Visualize your ideal future.
Look at your goals every single day. Write them down. Think about them.
Get obsessed with your dream instead of what is going on in the news and social media.

Listen To Motivational Voices
Listen to positive podcasts, online seminars, read books, listen to audio books.
Listen to messages of faith and hope by your favorite pastor.
Listening to positive messages will rewire your brain and it will silence the voices of anxiety, worry and fear.
It will make you more positive and it will create a more positive mindset.

Spend Time With Happy People
Spend time with people and friends that are positive. You might not be able to spend time with them in person but Zoom, Skype and FaceTime is always an option.
If you have someone close to you that is very negative you might want to make them aware of this.
You don't have to blame them you can simply make them aware of the fact.

Self Care.....Exercise, Diet & Sleep
The more that you consume of what makes you tired will also lower your motivation.
The wrong foods, too much alcohol, lack of exercise and not enough sleep, might leave you with an hangover the next day.
If you consume a lot of news and social media especially during the evening hours, the harder it will be for you to get a good nights sleep and you might wake up with a hang-over the next day and then you will experience a loss of motivation.
If you engage in unhealthy consumption of food, drugs, alcohol, news or social media, motivation will drop.
Overconsumption will slow you down.
Don't steal from your self care by overconsuming unhealthy things.

I don't consume a lot. I don't watch TV or spend time on social media, and I only check the news once a day for a few minutes. But during this past month I felt like my motivation was fading and I had to up my game when it came to listening to positive podcasts, audio-books, reading books and also listening to my favorite pastor. I increased my "POWER HOUR". It's longer than one hour right now.
I also had to re-connect with my ideal future. I had stopped visualizing and I had stopped looking at  my goals on a daily basis.
I had gotten consumed with what was in front of me instead of visualizing what could be.
I also have consumed too much sugar and gluten for a while and it has made me sluggish and unmotivated. So now I have decided to cut it out of my diet as much as possible.
I am also stepping up my exercise routine. I stopped doing yoga 2 months ago, but last week I started my yoga practice again.

Do something simple today that will have a positive impact on your future.
Action leads to momentum and that leads to increased motivation.


Monday, May 11, 2020

What Do You Feed Your Mind?

                                       "It's the food which you furnish to your mind
                                     that determines the whole character of your life."
                                                             - Emmet Fox

I am sure that you have heard a lot of people say that your body is what you feed it.

If we feed our body great stuff, we will feel better and our bodies will feel better.
If we give our bodies the right fuel, we will feel more energized, have more stamina, feel happier and our overall quality of life will be a lot better than if we feed our bodies unhealthy and low quality products or fuel.

It's the same way with our cars. If we want our cars to run good we have to put good fuel into the car. Have the oil changed and also service the care, when needed. If we ignore to do this, the care won't be running as well and eventually the car might even break down.

Our minds will also reflect what we are feeding it. We need great mind food to allow our minds to operate on a high level. Our environment, what we watch on TV, the internet, what we read, the people and groups of people that we associate with on a regular basis, our close family and friends have a huge effect on the way we think.
What kind of food are you serving your mind on a regular basis?

When we plant a new flower in our garden, we have to make sure that the plant is going to get just the right amount of sunshine. We have to dig a big enough whole for it so the roots have room to grow. We have to water it regularly and we also have to fertilize the plant to make it grow, expand and blossom. The bigger and more vibrant we want the plant to grow, the more we have to water and fertilize it.

It's the same way with our minds. Are you giving your mind enough water for it to grow or are you watering the weeds instead? The weeds I am referring to is all the negativity that we are surrounded by everywhere. The news on TV and internet, the newspaper and the negative people that we encounter everywhere on a daily basis.
Negative voices and influences are everywhere. You can't afford to water the weeds.

Are you fertilizing your mind with great nutritional food like reading and learning about people that are doing great things in this world? Are you reading inspiring and empowering books, articles written by people who have accomplished amazing things and that are continuing to do great things?
Are you spending time with people that want to grow, expand and do great things in this world, or do you prefer the status quo?

Are you giving your mind room to grow by trying new things? Maybe learning some new skills, meet new people, starting a new hobby or joining a new group of people instead of always spending time with the same reference group and do the same things that you have been doing for the last 5, 10, or 25 years?

Your body is what you feed it.
Your mind is what you feed it.

Maybe it's time to take a closer look at what you are feeding your mind?


Monday, May 4, 2020

Is It Time To Detox Your Brain?

                                                         Negative thinking
                                              will never make your life positive.

Have you been dealing with negative thoughts in your life?
Maybe you have been stuck in a negative thought pattern for a while?
If your answer is YES to these might need a brain detox!

I am sure that many of you have heard about detoxing your body and maybe some of you have even tried it for yourself.

Lately we have come to find out that a lot of illnesses are the result of toxins been lodged in the body and it needs to come out. This is accomplished in a various of ways.  A lot of people have had amazing results due to going through a detox of their body.

How about your brain, does it need to go through a detox?

What is a brain detox?
During a brain detox you will replace your toxic, negative thoughts with healthy and positive ones.
Once you do this you will discover amazing results in every area of your life.

Consciously controlling your thought patterns is one of the best ways of detoxing your brain. When you do this detox it will allow you to get rid of the toxic thoughts and emotions that can and will consume and control your mind.

Change your thoughts and you will change your life.
Change in your thinking is essential to detoxing your brain. To consciously controlling your thought patterns means that you won't allow toxic thoughts to run wild through your mind. It means that you pay attention to your thoughts. Examine and analyze your thought, before you decide to either accept or reject the thoughts.

How many "should have, could have and would have" statements..... have you made today?

How many "if only"..... have you made today?

How many times have you replayed  a situation or conversation that has not even happened yet and might never happen?

How many times have you replayed an old hurtful memory from the past?

How many scenarios have you created of doom and gloom that you believe will happen in the future?

How much is speculation on your part?

Are you making up your own stories about a disease that you think you might have?

Are you making up stores of why you can't be successful in life?

Is your mind passive? Are you allowing any thought to enter you mind without examining it?

Do you think your brain needs a detox right now?

Brain Detox
Start by replacing wrong and unhealthy thoughts with right and healthy thoughts.
Negative thoughts will weaken you while positive thoughts will strengthen you.

Of course this will be a process that you have participate in throughout your life. But each and every negative or toxic thoughts that is replaces with a positive and empowering thought, will create more joy, health, happiness and peace in your body and in your life.


Monday, April 27, 2020

How To Get Unstuck And Start Moving Toward The Life Of Your Dreams

                                         You can't start the next chapter of your life,
                                              if you keep re-reading the last one.

I remember an incident that happened many years ago when I was in my early twenties. I was out driving in the country with one of my friends. At this time, I wasn't the most experienced driver. It was wintertime in Sweden and at this particular time that I am talking about, it was quite a bit of snow on the ground and very cold weather. I can't recall why my friend and I decided to take a drive in the country. Due to all the snow and ice roads, I wasn't driving very fast. As we were driving along and having a good time I decided to turn onto a very small and narrow road. I slowed down to make the turn but I didn't slow down enough. I didn't realize that the road I was going to turn onto was covered with ice. As I made the turn the next thing that happened was that the car hit the ice. I tried to keep the car on the road, but unfortunately the car started to slowly slide sideways, into the ditch. A few seconds later my friend and I looked at each other quite surprised at what had happened. We got out of the car. No one was hurt. Luckily for us a guy had seen what happened and he came over and offered to help pull us out of the ditch. We gladly accepted his help and a few minutes later he returned with his tractor. About fifteen minutes later the car was pulled out of the ditch without even a dent in it. We thanked the guy very much for pulling us out of the ditch

By now you might wonder.....where I am you going with this story?

Let me explain.
Think of the car as your own life. Sometimes in life we will end up in the ditch by some unforeseen incident, setback or crisis. Something happened that we didn't expect. Usually it is a loss of some kind that will get us off track and into the ditch. Maybe a divorce, death of a loved one, health problems, a severe illness, financial loss, job loss or betrayal just to name a few.

All of us will end up in the ditch at some time during our lifetime. No one will go through life without setbacks, obstacles and full blown crisis.
Do we remain in the ditch?
Of course not. We will look around and try to figure out how to get out of the ditch.

Unfortunately, I have met many people in my life and in my own coaching business that ended up in the ditch due to something that happened to them in their life. The sad thing is that 5, 10, 20 or even 50 years later they are still in the ditch. These are the people that will always tell you about how unfair everything is, how bad their life is, how terrible people are and how badly they been treated their whole life. And if it wasn't for bad luck, they wouldn't have had any luck at all.
Do you know someone like that? Or maybe it's sounds like YOU?

I get it that sometimes people can be very mean and they will do horrible things to us, but continuing to focus on what they did or didn't do, will only make us stay stuck in the ditch. And after a while no one will care that we are stuck in the ditch. The only people we will have around us are other people who are also living in the ditch. Birds of a feather will flock together.

                                        "Uncover the truth about where you are and  
                                you can begin to draw a map to where you desire to be."
                                                           - Valorie Burton

Now how do we get unstuck?
We get a tractor to pull us out. The tractor is representing a compelling future that we must create for ourselves. Something that will pull us forward when things get tough. We know where we are (stuck) but we must figure out where we want to go in the future.

What happened to that big dream that you had in your twenties or thirties? Maybe it's time to dust it off, create a game plan and then begin to take some new steps towards accomplishing your big dream? Maybe you need to set some goals and then take action on these goals? Maybe you must change our habits.?You must stop certain unhealthy habits and create better habits for yourself.
The solution(s) is the tractor. Yes, I am in the ditch right now, but what can I do now to get out of here?
Stop focusing and on the problem. Stop talking to everyone about the problem and start focusing on solution(s)

Without a vision for the future it will be easy for us to drift, get stuck and to remain stuck.

I speak from experience. I have been in the ditch many times. A few times it took a little while to get out of the ditch. In 2012 I had a complete smackdown that caught me off guard.  It was a huge betrayal by two people very close to me and it took sometime to heal from that one.

Sometimes I end up in the ditch over something very small. But if I relax and focus on where I want to go,  the next day I am usually back on track again. As we experience ending up in the ditch a few times, we usually get better at getting up, and we also usually get back up and back on track faster too.

If we have a great life plan for our life it is a lot easier to get out of the ditch and we won't remain there very long. If we don't have a life plan or we have allowed someone else to plan our life, we might stay stuck a lot longer and sometimes even forever. And we don't want that to happen.

Create an amazing vision for your life so that you won't be drifting. If you have a vison for your life, you know where you are going and if you happened to end up in the ditch you know that is only temporary and soon you will be out of the ditch and back on track again.

It's time to get unstuck and start moving towards the life of your dreams.


Monday, April 20, 2020

Detours - The Unpredictable Path To Your Destiny

                                                    Part of reaching your destiny
                                                   is understanding your detours

Many years ago as I was going to take a trip and visit my parents in Växjö, Sweden (I was born and raised in Sweden and moved to the US in 1987), I was forced to change my travel plans. In other words I hade to take a detour.
I was flying out of Houston, via Chicago and then to Copenhagen, Denmark. In Copenhagen I had to get on another plane that would take me to my final destination which was Växjö, Sweden.

I had flown this route many times and I was excited to get on the plane and go home and visit my friends and my family in Sweden.

But as I was checking in at the airport in Houston they told me that were no airplanes going to or leaving Chicago that day, due to severe weather. Of course I was disappointed because I was ready to go. "What should I do now?" I asked the lady at the ticket counter. She told me that I could go home and try again tomorrow. But they didn't know if the weather was going to be any better tomorrow.
Or I could come back in about ten hours and then I could fly with a different airline and I would have to connect flights in London, England instead of Chicago. And after, I would fly from London to Copenhagen. But of course I would be delayed over ten hours or maybe even more if I encountered any other problems on the way.
Or I could just decide not to go at all, and forget about the whole trip.

I told the lady to book me on the flight through London instead. I went home and ten hours later I was back at the airport ready to go again. And this time the plane left on time and I was on way to Europe. When I arrived at Gatwick airport in London, they informed that I had just missed my connecting flight to Copenhagen. But they told that they could get me on a bus that would take me to Heathrow airport and that there will be a flight available there that would connect me to get to Copenhagen.
Another detour.....should I stop now and go home? Of course not. I got on the bus and a little over an hour later, I was at Heathrow airport. I got on my plane to Copenhagen and then the final flight into my hometown in Sweden. I made it to Växjö and I had a wonderful visit in Sweden.

Would you have stopped at the ticket counter in Houston when they told you that your flight had been cancelled due to bad weather? Of course not.
Would you have stopped at the Gatwick airport in England when they told you that you had missed your flight? Of course not. You would just simply find another route that would have taken you to your final destination.

So why do most people stop pursuing their goal when they run into an obstacle, setback or detour? Why don't most people apply the same principle as in the example below? Instead most people give up when they encounter a temporary setback. Or they quit when they have to find a different path to get onto because the other path is not available any longer. They give up and tell themselves that is wasn't meant to be. These people often feel like a failure and they bury their dream way back in the mind so they don't have to think about it anymore.

A goal is the final destination to where you want to go. You have a great plan on how to get there. You start your trip towards the goal and bad weather hits in the form of an obstacle or setback. Should you go back to where you started? No, you simply take a step back. Look at the situation and figure out a different route that you can take that will take you to your final destination

                                                "Lessons often come dressed up as
                                                     detours and roadblocks."
                                                            - Oprah Winfrey

A detour simply means another route. It should never mean surrendering your goal.

I can't tell all the times that I had to change my route when I was flying either from the US to Sweden, or back home to the US. Not one time did I quit or return home. I simply found a new route and I always made it to Sweden and back home to the US.

When you come to a roadblock.....take a detour!


Monday, April 13, 2020

You Have The Right To Be You

                                          When you stop trying to change others
                                               and work on changing yourself,
                                             your world changes for the better.

You have the right to be you..... but at the same time you must also allow others to be who they are.

Thinking everyone should be like us is one of our biggest problems in relationships and it causes a lot of wrong thinking and wrong attitudes that are damaging to healthy and fulfilling marriages, friendships and work relationships.

Do you think you are the perfect standard of what you think people should be and act like?

Are you having trouble getting along with others, especially if they don't think and act like you do?

Do you have the confidence to be who you were created to be, or do you feel like you have to apologize for how you see things and what you like and dislike?

Do you give the same freedom to others? Do you allow them to be who they were created to be or do you try to change people, they way they think and what they do?

All of us are very different and we must learn to accept that not everyone is the same.

If everyone were the same, liked the same things and did the same things, can you imagine how boring life would be.
We are created differently for a reason, and sometimes we might not understand why some people were created in a certain way, but we have to learn to accept people the way they are, without thinking that something is wrong with them, because they don't fit into our idea of normal.

What is normal anyway?

Normal to you..... might not be normal to me. Does it mean that you are wrong and I am right. Of course not. We are just created differently. We think differently and we act differently.

What if all people looked alike, behaved the same way and had the same temperament.
What about if all dogs and cats look the same. All the flowers and trees were the same. What if we lived in the same looking houses, drove the same kind of car, dressed alike and we all did the same activities and hobbies. Would you be bored?

Learn to appreciate the variety this world has to offer. Differences makes life interesting and it gives us the opportunity to learn, expand  and grow.

How many people have we shut out of our life, criticized and made to feel inferior simply because they didn't fit our standard of what we believe is normal?
More than we probably want to admit.

Of course we connect more with some people that we do with others and we don't want to be best friends with all people. But it doesn't give us the right to judge, criticize them and make them feel inferior and insignificant.


Monday, April 6, 2020

The Connection Between The Mind And The Mouth

                                                         "The words you speak
                                                    become the house you live in."
                                                                   - Hafiz

Do you pay attention to the words that come of your mouth?

Do you speak words that will inspire, empower, uplift and bring joy to yourself and others?

Or do you speak negative words? Words of doom and gloom, gossip, judgmental or critical words?

Think before you speak.
I am sure you have been taught this by your parents when you were a kid.

But do we think before we speak?
The truth is that we don't have to say everything that comes to our mind.

If we don't pay attention to what comes out of our mouth, especially when we are angry, disappointed or hurt, we can seriously hurt and damage our relationships with others with our own words.
Once we have spoken the words it will be difficult to take them back, no matter how many times we apologize for using the wrong words and saying things we should have kept to ourselves.

It's difficult to control our mouth unless we learn to control our minds. A word is a thought revealed. What is in the mind will come out of the mouth.

If we think about something frequently, we will eventually say it. In an unguarded moment we might blurt it out and cause some serious damage to someone else.

If we constantly think angry thoughts and speak angry words, we will eventually feel angry and might even display angry behavior towards others or even ourselves.

On the other hand if wee think and speak words of kindness, joy and love, we will also feel and display these words in the form of kindness and love towards others and ourselves.

When we determine that words have power, we will become more aware and more careful how we use them.

What we think and what we say out load will influence our own destiny.

                                      "What comes out of your mouth is determined
                                                  by what goes into your mind."
                                                            - Zig Ziglar

Words have great influence. They reveal what is in your mind.
Words can hurt or heal.
Words can encourage someone to keep going or give up.
Words can build people up or tear them down.
Words can put a smile on someone's face or make them cry.
Words can bring comfort.
Words can bring love or hate.
Keep your word to others
Sometimes we have to eat our own words and deal with the consequences.


Fill your mind will good things. 
If you constantly think good, empowering and thoughts of love, there will be no room left for bad thoughts to enter your mind.

Use your words wisely. 
Learn to discipline your mind and what comes out of your mouth. Pay attention to your thoughts and your words or you can easily fall back into the bad habit again. 

Break the habit by thinking and speaking of what you want and who you want to become. 
Never what you cannot be or what will never happen.

What you constantly meditate and dwell upon, good or bad, will influence your destiny.


Monday, March 30, 2020

Persistence Is Your Greatest Asset

                       "Adversity has the effect of drawing out strength and qualities 
                                of a man that would have lain dormant in its absence."
                                                             - Herodotus

The bookstores and also the internet are filled with self-help books, articles, seminars and podcasts loaded with ideas that we all can use to be more successful in our lives.

However, all the ideas, advice and wisdom in the world won't help any of us if we don't motivate ourselves to take persistent, and continuous action in the direction of our vision and our goals.

The most important quality of success is self-discipline.
Self-discipline means that you will do what you know you must do, when you need to do it, whether you feel like it or not.

Do you have the ability to follow through on a resolution after the enthusiasm with the resolution was made, has passed?

Can you discipline yourself to pay the price over and over again, until you have finally reached your goal?

Will you still be able to discipline yourself when things get tough?

Is persistence a habit that anyone can learn and increase with time?
Yes..... and each time that we persist in the face of adversity or setback, we will build up the habit of persistence. Persistence is very much like a muscle. The more we use it, the bigger it gets.

Here are some encouraging and inspirational words that will let us know why simply "hanging in there" or "press on" can make a huge difference in our lives.

"Press on. Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is dull of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."
- Calvin Coolidge

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall."
- Confucius

"You become a champion by fighting one more round. When things are tough, you fight one more round."
- James J. Corbett

"There is no failure except in no longer trying."
- Elbert Hubbard

"It's not whether you get knocked down. It's whether you get up again."
- Vince Lombardi

"Success seems to be connected with action. Successful men keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit."
- Conrad Hilton

"What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he want and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it."
- Alexander Graham Bell

"You just keep pushing. You just keep pushing. I made every mistake that could be made, but I just kept pushing."
- Ren McPherson

"Before success comes in any man's life, he is sure to meet with much temporary defeat and, perhaps, some failure. When defeat overtakes a man, the easiest and most logical thing to do is quit. And that is exactly what a majority of men and women do."
- Napoleon Hill 

"Never give up then, for that is just the place and time the tide will turn."
- Harriet Beecher Stowe

"It's the constant and determined effort that breaks down all resistance, sweeps away all obstacles."
- Claude M. Bristol

"The most essential factor is persistence - the determination never to allow your energy or enthusiasm to be dampened by the discouragement that must inevitable come."
- James Whitcomb Riley

Persistence is the ability to face defeat again and again without giving up.

There is a great book called Three Feet From Gold......Have you read it?
It's written by Sharon L. Lechter and Greg S. Reid.
Check it out!!!

Here is a question for YOU!
Will you do what you have resolved to do?


Monday, March 23, 2020

Worry Is Like A Thief That Will Steal Your Peace

                                                              Worrying is a waste of time.
                                                              It doesn't change anything.
                                                              All it does is steal your joy 
                                                  and keep you very busy doing nothing.

Ninety-five percent of what we worry about in our life, will never actually happen. 
Worrying is a waste of time.

Do you worry a lot?
What exactly is worry?
You can say that worry is an attack on our mind, or I like to say.....our mind is being hijacked.

One definition of worry is: give way to anxiety or unease; allow one's mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles.

Worrying is a learned habit and I have to admit that my mind will also get hijacked into worrying sometimes about all kinds of scary scenarios that probably will never happen. I have to work on doing away with this bad habit of worrying. But sometimes I do end up in the ditch with my mind showing me all kinds of movie clips of doom and gloom. This happens mostly when my mind is getting really tired.

Worry will prevent us from living in peace, feeling joy and happiness. Worry is like a thief that will steal our dream.

Some people might even get addicted to worrying. If they don't have something to worry about of their own, they will worry over someone else's situation or the situation of the world.

The problem with worry is that it accomplishes absolutely nothing. Instead it steals our peace because it's impossible to worry and be at peace at the same time. Feeling peaceful is a habit and so is worrying.

When we worry we give way to anxiety and unease. We allow our mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles. Worry is like a source of nagging concern. In a way we are being tormented by our own disturbing thoughts. Stinking thinking.

Worry will keep our mind so busy with our own thinking that it never gets around to do what it's actually created to do. To create a vision for our life and to grow and expand. It will hinder our own progress.

                                           "Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair.
                                                 It gives you something to do
                                              but it doesn't get you anywhere."
                                                           - English proverb

Stop wasting your precious time trying to come up with and answer or solutions to difficulties and troubles that you have no control over. They might not have happened yet, and they might never even happen.

The problem is that if we dwell long enough in our own mind, it will eventually come out of our mouth. Remember that our words are very powerful and we listen to every word that we say. Our words will confirm our beliefs and also our faith.....or lack of faith.

Worry won't help us one bit. As a matter of fact it will only slow down or even hinder our progress. It's like spending today trying to figure out tomorrow. It's impossible to figure out tomorrow or the next day and the day after that. Don't spend today, worrying about tomorrow, because you have enough things going on today and it needs your full attention.

We must to learn to be mindful and to live here and now to the fullest. I also want to remind you that we are more capable than we usually give ourselves credit for. We are well equipped to handle what must be handled today. We mustn't waste our mental energy on tomorrow, for we will be equipped for what will happen tomorrow.

Our mind is sometimes like a soap opera director. It will play movies on our own mental screen of doom and gloom. Time to turn of those movies and time to get rid of the soap opera direction once and for all.

Here are a few TIPS!!!!

Take one day at a time. Don't worry and be anxious about tomorrow. Be here and now.....100 percent.

When a thought of worry or anxiety enters your mind, simply say.....NO Thank You!!! 
I got this..... I can handle it..... and I don't need you.

Ask for help from a higher power. It doesn't matter what you believe in,  but sometimes we will need a little help. Because sometimes a problem is too big for us to handle and we need to hand it over to something greater than ourselves. The battle is not ours to fight. Let it go and take a rest.

Stop wasting your time worrying because you will accomplish nothing. You will only waste your precious time and you will make yourself miserable. The time you spent worrying you will never get it back and you sure can use your time more wisely, than to worry.

Worrying is a learned habit that can be un-learned with some effort on your part, some trust and faith. You can't wait for a time when you have nothing to worry about, to stop worrying.....because it will probably never happen. Learn to have peace in the midst of the storm.

Have a vision and some goals for your life. When worry and anxiety sets in you can re-direct your thoughts onto your dream. Instead of focusing on worry.... you focus on accomplishing your big dream and your goals.

Turn off the TV and the 24 hours newsfeed once in a while and give your mind a break. Don't read about all the doom and gloom in the newspaper and online. This one is an easy fix. You must give yourself a break once in a while. Also stop talking about all your worries. You are just making them bigger and bigger.

What Do You Gain By Worrying?

Worry is useless. Worry doesn't not accomplish anything good.
Worry never makes anything why not give it up?