Monday, July 15, 2019

The Power of YOU

                                 You were not born to play it small. You were born to sail. 
                       To expand, to grow and to live a bigger and brighter version of you.





How are you coming along with your goals for this year?

What was the goal that you decided that you wanted to make your reality at the beginning of this year?

You can become more by having goals and working towards them. In life you don't get what you want - you get in life what you are. But you can always become more by developing yourself.


Today I want you to take a look at your life. 

Where are you right now?

What are your strengths and what are your weaknesses?

What gives your life meaning and a sense of fulfillment and joy?

What does a full, rich life mean to you?

What is it that you can love doing 7 days a week, that will bring a smile to yourself?

Think about that. In all areas of your life. Your professional life, personal life, family life and your spiritual life.

What is it that you like to have?

                                      Embrace the unknown and be okay with letting go 
                                   of something or someone that isn't meeting your needs.


Once you have your vision and goals determined you must make sure that you surround yourself with people that will contribute to your growth. Align yourself with people who think like you do. Who dream like you do. Other people who also want more out of life. You must find people who are stretching, searching and seeking some higher ground in life.

Get on top of life because it's the bottom that is overcrowded. It's easy to be on the bottom because it doesn't take any effort to be a non doer and a drifter. It doesn't take any motivation or drive to stay on a low level.

                                            If you don't have anything to move towards, 
                                         chances are that you will settle for where you are.

You must have energy when it comes to your dream or your vision. You must have a burning desire and you must be willing to do the things today that will give you what you want, tomorrow.
Commit to your dream long term. Whether it's easy or not. It doesn't really matter. You are going to do it.

                                                The wait is that critical period between
                                                              wanting and getting.


Put together a system in your life - and follow it.

                                                           www.karinglannstam.com

Wednesday, July 10, 2019

Don't Quit, Because You Do Make A Difference

                                                 "You were given this life to live,
                                           because you are strong enough to live it."
                                                                - Unknown






We must all have a vision for the future. In other words, we must create a compelling future.

If we don't have anything to move towards chances are that we will settle for the way things are. Most people accept the reality that they have been given.

We are not born to play small. We were born to shine our light. We were born to expand, to grow and to live a bigger and brighter version of ourselves.




You can't step into the future with an old way of looking at things. A new life comes from a new mind and a new way of looking at yourself and your life.

It's impossible to step into the future and if you remain constantly thinking about the past. The past cannot be changed, forgotten, edited or erased. It can only be accepted.

The more you ruminate on negative thoughts and your past, the more power you give them. Time to move on. What happened to you in the past - happened. You can allow it to destroy you, or you can allow it to build you up.

It's up to each and everyone of us to step up and take care of our own lives and deal with the consequences of our own action or inaction.




Stay on your own path in life. The path that was designed for you, and only you. If you aren't following your own path you might never realize your own potential.

Keep on moving. Momentum is everything. The less you move, the less you are able to move. Action leads to more action.

Take action today. It doesn't have to be perfect action. Imperfect action is perfect. Do it messy, if you have to. That's OK.

Don't quit, because you do make a difference. Never give up on your dream. The reasons will take you through the storms of life. The reasons you started - think of those when you want to quit and feel like you can't go on. The reasons will comfort you.




You have to have energy when it comes to your dream. You must have a hunger or a burning desire to keep on going.
Be willing to do things today that will give you the tomorrow that you are looking for.

Put together a system in your life. Daily empowering and inspiring rituals. Sometimes they may not be that easy to follow, but I want you to raise your standards for yourself and follow them anyway.
Be committed to doing it long-term. Whether it's easy or not. It doesn't matter. You are going to do it.
Commitment means taking a stand for YOU.

Never let anyone's opinion of you, become your reality. Doubts kills more dreams then failure ever will. Invest in yourself and expect to win.


                                             Only as high as I reach can I grow:
                                                 only as far as I seek can I go:
                                                only as deep as I look can I see:
                                               only as much as I dream can I be.


Stand up for your life!!!


                                                           www.karinglannstam.com



Monday, July 8, 2019

Now.....What?

                                              "Getting knocked down in life is a given.
                                           Getting up and moving forward is a choice."
                                                                 - Zig Ziglar





Have you ever reached a very important goal and thought that when you accomplished it, you were going to feel absolutely amazing, so happy, proud of yourself, content with your accomplishment but instead you felt absolutely nothing?

Actually you might even have felt disappointed, let down and far from the amazing feeling that you were counting on would happen. Instead you actually felt a big void in your life and you were asking yourself.....
Is this it? What do I do now?
Now.....What? 

I remember when I graduated from my one year online coaching program back in May of 2014, I thought I was going to feel so wonderful that I had finally accomplished something that I had been thinking about and planning for, for over 3 years. And after it was all said and done, I felt disappointed, sad and discouraged. And I didn't really know how to procced with my life and my new business for a month or two after I graduated.
I wasn't depressed, but I felt very lost without my daily work with the coaching school. With the online lessons and the projects that had to be done and sent to the school for review. I also missed my coaching buddies in my pod group , that I had gotten to know during this year. It was like a big void, and I remember thinking many times, what am I going to do now?
Now.....What?

A few weeks ago I was listening to and interview that Tony Robbins had done with Michael Phelps, the amazing Olympic swimmer that competed in four Olympic Games in a row and won 28 metals all together.
His whole life consisted of training and getting ready for the next competition. He talked to Tony about that after he retired from being an Olympic swimmer and when he didn't train and compete the same way he was used to doing throughout almost his entire life, he became depressed.
The question is, where do you go now? Michael Phelps had done nothing but train and compete most of his life.  He had been to the Olympic games four times and won 28 metals.....how can you now adjust to being just a regular guy?
Now.....What?

When the first astronauts had come back from the moon and then tried to adjust to normal life after training for years and then walking on the moon.....some of these astronauts became depressed and became alcoholics and they abused drugs. How do you adjust to just being a regular guy after you have walked on the moon? Where do you go from there? How can you now adjust to every day normal life?
Now.....What?

Back in 2012 after I had walked away from a very emotional and psychological abusive relationship that I had been in for several years, I thought I was going to feel so relieved, great and get my energy back within a few months, but that did not happen.
Instead I felt disappointed, let down, sad and almost depressed and I did not get my energy back for a very long time.
What happened was that I had been focusing on this man's bad and unpredictable behavior for years. I had walked on eggshells, read everything I could get my hands on when it came to how to deal with a narcissist, planned my escape and once I got away, I felt absolutely nothing. No joy, no happiness.....nothing. Instead I felt completely lost, sad and very lonely. I was thinking many times.....
Now.....What?




So what is going on here and how can we plan in advance so this doesn't happen, after we complete a big and amazing goal?

We must develop an "after plan" for when we have reached our most important goal.

How do we do this?

We have to have two or more goals going on at the same time, so when we complete one goal and after we have celebrated our success, we have to have something else to focus on right away. Because if we do, then we won't feel disappointed, sad, let down or depressed because now it's time to move on to the next big goal and accomplish it.

Every time after I finish writing, editing and publishing a book, I feel a void. 
I have usually spent quite a bit of time with every book and when the project is completed, I feel a little bit of sadness and I think.....
Now.....What?
Answer: I start writing another book.

TIP!
Always have a plan ready to go after you accomplish your goal, so that you won't fall into depression or waste time feeling lost on your path.
And if you happen to fall off the path, make sure you get up quickly and keep on going towards your new amazing goal(s) and your amazing future.



                                                         www.karinglannstam.com

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Feeling Stuck?

                                                     "Staying stuck in the past
                                                   is stealing from your future."
                                                            - Robin Sharman




Do you feel stuck in some area(s) of you life?

You do want to change but for some reason you keep doing the same thing day in and day out.
Year in and year out.

If we don't change something that we do, then nothing is going to change in our lives.

A lot of people walk around hoping that things will change for them, without them having to do anything about it themselves.

They hope that their spouse is going to change. That their boss is going to change. That their job is going to change and that the economy is going to change.

Do you believe that things will actually change without you having to do something about it, yourself?

It's so easy to point the finger at everyone else, but yourself.


                                                 "If you stay stuck in the past,
                                                no one will stay there with you.
                                                  If you look back on the past,
                               you'll just speed your life walking backwards."
                                                               - Unknown


I believe that for things to change for you, you must first make a decision that you want things to change and that you yourself are going to do something to make it happen.

After the decision has been made and you are committed to change, you actually have to act on that decision.

Most people don't actually make true decisions, because they can't see how that are going to get to where they want to go.
Instead they keep on doing things that they can see how they are going to get there and this is usually why their life really never changes.


                                            "You are not stuck where you are
                                                   unless you decide to be."
                                                         - Wayne Dyer


Do you have a major challenge right now that is keeping you stuck?

How long are you going to repeat the same thing over and over again?


Tip!
Think of one small change that you can start doing today that will change your life for the better.
It doesn't have to be a huge thing. Start small and work your way up.

Start doing that thing today. Don't delay. Don't wait until you feel like it.
Make a decision and.....
Do It NOW!!!

                                                         www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, July 1, 2019

Back In 2012 My Life Was A Big Fat Mess, But Then I Did This....

                                  "Some will push you forwards, others will pull you back.
                                              Regardless of who's pushing or pulling,
                                            the strongest chooses their own direction."
                                                                 - Rolsey




Have you ever had your life totally collapse on you?

This is what happened to me back in the spring of 2012. By life was in a big fat mess, and I found myself  hanging on by a thread.

This downfall didn't happen overnight. It had been brewing for a couple of years, but in April of 2012, it totally collapsed.

Three things happened at almost the same time.

First, my mother passed away at the age of 86, in Dec. of 2011. She had lived a long life, but it was hard to lose your own mother.

Second, in March of 2012,  I had to walk away from a emotional, phycological and financial abusive relationship. This man was a narcissist and the only thing I could do was to leave almost everything behind, if I wanted to keep my health and my sanity. So I packed my bags and left, together with my 2 dogs.

Third, in April of 2012 I had to return to Sweden after living in the US for 25 years (I was born and raised there). Since my ex had cut off all the money, I had no place to live and no way of supporting myself in the US, I felt like I had no other option than to go back to Sweden.

So in April of 2012 I found myself in a big fat mess. Sitting in an apartment with my 2 dogs in Sweden, thinking.....what the heck happened??????

It took a while for my head to clear. It was like I had been in a huge car wreck, and I couldn't think straight for a couple of months.


                                                 Sometimes when things fall apart
                                              they may actually be falling together.


But in July of 2012, I did something that would forever change my life.....
I hired a LIFE COACH and I created a BIG VISION for my life.
It made such a huge difference in my life.
Actually it saved my life.

Who would have thought that having a vision for my life would be such a game changer. Before 2012 I don't believe that I had ever sat down and asked myself what I wanted my life to look like. I had been busy living someone else's life for 25 years, and they didn't ask me what I wanted.

But in July of 2012 it all changed when I met my first life coach.
The first time we met, he gave me a future visioning process to do. I did it, and everything changed then and there, and I haven't looked back.

Since then I have come to realize how important it is for all of us to have a compelling future.
We must create a vision for our lives.
We must have goals in every area of our lives.
We also  must create a game plan how to get to where we want to go, and then take action on that game plan on a daily base
We must create new empowering habits that will take us to where we want to go. Old habits have to go and we must develop some new ones.

Only 5% of the population has specific, written down goals.
Goals have to be specific, and if you don't write then down and create a deadline for when you want to accomplish your goal(s), you will only be a dreamer and not a creator.

I can't tell you how important having a vision for my life has been.
It changed my life completely back in 2012.

Don't go through life without asking yourself.....
What do I want my life to look like in 2, 5, or 10 years?
Become a part of the 5%.





I want to invite you to attend a presentation that I am doing next Tuesday July 9th, at a networking even with the CBFA - Christian Business Fellowship Association.
The title of the presentation is.....
12 Strategies That Will Have A Huge Impact In Your Life & In Your Business.

On July 25, I will do another presentation at GenuWine and the title of this presentation is......
Never Give Up! Set A Goal & Go For It!

During these presentations I will share some great wisdom and insight on how you can create the life that you dream of and that you desire.


If you have any questions you can send me and email -  karin@karinglannstam.com
or you can contact me through my website - www.karinglannstam.com

Looking Forward To Seeing YOU!!!


12 Strategies That Will Have A Huge Impact In Your Life & In Your Business
Where: Tito's Cantina. 25250 Northwest Frwy, Cypress, TX
When: July 9th. 11.30 - 1pm
FREE

Never Give Up! Set A Goal & Go For It!
Where: GenuWine. 6503 FM 1488, Magnolia, TX
When: July 25th. 6.30 - 8pm
FREE



                                                              www.karinglannstam.com



Wednesday, June 26, 2019

Be Patient. Everything Is Coming Together

                                        "Patience is the acceptance that things can happen
                                         in a different order than the one you have in mind."
                                                           - David G. Allen 





Do you know what one of the greatest enemies to you success, (whatever success is for you) is?

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I will tell you anyway
It's PATIENCE.

Simple, but yet so complicated.
I know I struggle a lot with this. I know that I need to increase my patience muscle.
How about you? Does your patience muscle need a good workout?

Anything you want to accomplish will take time. The bigger the goal, usually the longer time it will take for you to reach it.
Patience like faith, requires work.

Progress comes slowly. The formation of new habits and the breaking of old ones are no quick change.
I just want you to remember that hard work will pay off, and that worthwhile goals will take time to achieve.

One thing that we must learn is to have patience to maintain our enthusiasm and industriousness when pursuing our goals.
Good things will take time.


                                                              "Trust the process
                                                             Your time is coming.
                                                   Just do the work and the results
                                                           will handle themselves."
                                                                 - Tony Gaskins


Also when we are more patient while reaching our goals, the greater appreciation we will have of our success when it comes.

On our journey to reaching our goals we will encounter setbacks and adversity. Being patient in these situation will make it easier for us to bounce back and get back on track.


                                                 "Patience is not the ability to wait.
                                             but how you act while you are waiting."
                                                                 - Joyce Meyer


So, where in your life do you need to be more patient. right now?


Be patient. 
Trust the journey, even if it doesn't make sense sometimes.
Everything is coming together.



                                                             www.karnglannstam.com


Monday, June 24, 2019

It's Easier To Criticize Than To Create

                                      "Let the refining and improving of your own life,
                                          keep you so busy that you have little time
                                                           to criticize others."
                                                        - H. Jackson Brown JR.






Do you know someone that is constantly criticizing the looks or efforts of others?

Maybe you are that person that is doing the criticizing?

Maybe you are on the receiving end of a lot of criticism, and you don't understand why?

Critics are everywhere. They might be your family members, friends, your boss, co-workers, spouse. Or it might even be someone that you don't even know, criticizing you on the internet.

I have had my fair share of critics and haters and  I have come to the conclusion that life is way too short to take critics seriously.
I have a life purpose and I am busy pursuing my dream. I don't have time for theses kinds of people.
I have a sense of meaningful work that I am doing. I have plenty of projects and a career to pursue.

Of course it hurts and it feels unfair when people that you know and sometimes that you don't know are slinging crap in your direction. But one thing I have come to understand is this.....
Someone's opinion of me, doesn't change my reality. It's just an opinion.

I want you to understand this too, because it's very important.
Again....someone's opinion of you doesn't have to become your reality.
Opinions only have power over you, when you agree with them.

What these critics are trying to do is to try to pull you down to their level, and keep you there.
They are a huge distraction to you life purpose.
Critics do not have a life purpose, and if they do they are not pursuing it very hard, or they might even be totally off track with their life and their purpose in life.
They are procrastinators and they don't like hard work.

Critics are doing the easy thing.
They are criticizing someone else, instead of developing themselves and their own life purpose or dream.
They don't know how to pursue their own greatness. They don't want to focus and they don't want to put in the hard work towards their dream.
Critics don't have to do anything. All they have to do is to sit back and dish out crap.

Pursuing your own dream and life purpose is not an easy thing to do.
As a matter of fact it is often very challenging. It will demand everything of you. You don't have time to sit back and do nothing.
You are responsible for creating results. You are working hard towards something useful in life.
You want to improve and make a difference in your own life and also in the world.


How To Deal With Critics

Be clear with yourself about your own values.

Be clear about your own goals and dreams in life.

It's very important that you have a life purpose. If you don't, figure it out right now.

Keep going.

Build momentum and just plow right through those critics.
Opinions are like ghosts. Don't believe that ghosts are real. You can just push right through them and they will disappear. Poof....and they are gone.
Don't allow these ghosts to haunt you for years.

Know the truth.

Be confident.

Don't take the criticism seriously. 
Don't allow it to slow you down on your path of pursuing your life purpose.


                                        "Any amount of time you spend criticizing others,
                                           it's time you could spend improving yourself."
                                                                 - Nate Miller


In the end we have to take responsibility for the results that we want in life. Don't rely on people with really bad and discouraging opinions of you and your work. Never give away your power to those people.

Check out this Motivational Minute.



Create your own success.
Create massive value for the world.

                                                           www.karinglannstam.com



Wednesday, June 19, 2019

Only You Can Be You. Use Your Own Gifts & Talents

                                                    "Stop holding onto the things
                                                        that makes you feel bad 
                                            and make room for what is good for you."





I wrote a blog the other day about my belief that we are all created for a specific purpose here on earth, and that our purpose is closely connected to doing something that we enjoy doing, it's easy for us to do and we are good at doing it.
If you missed my BLOG - Be a light house for someone else.....here is the link
http://karinglannstam.blogspot.com/2019/06/be-lighthouse-for-someone-else.html

But often we doubt that if we are good at doing something and if it comes easy to us, than it isn't of any great value? Because if we can do it, anyone can do it.

Are you really good at something and you know it, but at the same time you discount yourself by saying things like.....

If it is that easy to do, anyone can do it
Since it's so easy to do, there is no way anyone will pay me for my work 
Anyone can do what I do. I am not unique in my skillset
What I do probably won't help anyone
Anyone can learn to do what I do
I am not going to use my skills, why bother, others are better than me at doing this


If this sounds like you.....STOP thinking this way.
Your purpose is unique to you, and you are better than anybody when it comes to this particular skill or gift.

When you are forced to do something that is out of alignment with who you are and your talents, it will most often create tension, low level of energy, discomfort and it will require extra effort on your part.

On the other hand when you are being the way you were created, when you are being YOU, it feels wonderful to do those things. You will have unlimited energy and you will feel huge satisfaction at the end of the day.

Right now you should seriously examine what you are good at doing and what you are not good at doing.
Figure out what you are good at doing. Write it down on a piece of paper. Now, start doing more of that.
At the same time do less of what you are not good at or enjoy doing. If it doesn't give you joy, it might not be you given purpose.

I know that we all need to pay our bills and sometimes pursuing our purpose might not pay a lot in the beginning. By maybe you can find some time in the evenings or on the weekends, to start doing it for a while until you build up momentum.

I know in my own life I was faced with this question back in 2012, when my whole life imploded. After doing some soul-searching I came up with a few answers. 
I love phycology. I love to find out about people from other countries. I am interested in people's stories and they way they live. I was born a very curious person and I love to ask questions. I was also good at listening and figure out people's problem's.

This is when the idea was born to become a life coach and start my own coaching business, which I did a year later in 2013. And in 2016 I published my first book to help people bounce back from a setback. I have now written 4 books and they are all about personal development and how to live a better life that is more in alignment with who you are.

I also struggle with the idea of why people would pay me for something that comes so natural to me, and that I love doing. But as we look at today's society, most people are not 100% present in the moment. They don't listen to their children, their spouse, family, boss, co-workers or friends. Instead a lot of people are spending more time staring at a screens, than face to face conversations. People are feeling very isolated, lonely, lost and they feel stuck. And when those feeling come up, a screen won't help them solve the problem.

Do you think there is a need for what I do? 
Of course it is. People are starved for some genuine conversation and they want someone to listen to them and pay attention to them. They need help to resolve issues, create goals and they need help with how to better their lives. People used to help each other, but now a lot of people have become too busy with their "screen friends" and they don't have time for their "real" friends and family.


Question
What are you good at doing? 
What do you enjoy doing?
What is easy for you to do?

Now, go out there and do it!!!


                                                             www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, June 17, 2019

Be A Lighthouse For Someone Else

                                                                  "Be yourself,
                                                           everyone else is taken."
                                                                  - Oscar Wilde






I believe that every single person on this earth was born with their own set of gifts and talents.
Those gifts are yours and only you can claim them and develop them. You are as unique as your own fingerprint. There will never ever be another person like you. You are custom-designed.

You are they way you are because you are created for a specific purpose. Your own purpose here on earth. Therefore you should never want to be like anyone else. Be yourself. Be authentic. You are a one of a kind copy. Be proud of who you are and start developing your own gifts and talents.

Yes, you are equipped for everything that you need on your journey through life. For very obstacle that you will encounter you are already equipped to handle it. You are never expected to handle more than what you are already equipped for.

Obstacles will appear on your path. If you learn the lesson that is being presented to you, usually in a form of some kind of difficulty or obstacle, you will advance to the next level. If you don't get the lesson, guess what? That lesson will be presented to you a little later in a different form, and maybe even a little more difficult. And if you get it this time, you will move on to the next level of your journey.

These lessons or obstacle are never there to stop you. Only to strengthen you and make you grow. Especially your internal muscles are being shaped and your character is being developed. In the process you might have to let go of a few habits that are no longer serving you, and learn some new ones that will enable you to move on the next part of your journey.

Nothing that happens in your life is ever insignificant. It is all for your own benefits and also for the benefit of others around you. Don't bury your talents. Use them. Develop them and share them with others and the world. Don't hold back, the world needs what you got.

Some people might be looking for you and  your gifts, right now. So don't hold back. What you have gone through in your life, will benefit someone else who is in the middle of going through what you have gone through already. Share your story.

Nothing is ever wasted, especially not your hurts and your pain. These experiences have shaped you into the human being that you have become. Sometimes your greatest talents and gifts are awakened and discovered out of your greatest pain.

Who could better help people recover from alcohol or drug abuse, than a person that has been through it themselves, and that are no sober and drug free.
Who can better help someone through domestic abuse and being able to see the light on the other side than someone who was strong enough to leave and abusive relationship themselves.
Who can better help someone deal with the death of a loved, than a person that as already gone through such an experience.


                                          "Let your light shine so that others can see
                                                      their way out of the dark."
                                                          - Timber Hawkaye


Use your painful experiences to help others. Sometimes we might be ashamed of some of our hurtful experiences. We all regret things we did when we were younger. Remember this, that experience happen a long time ago. You are not the same person today that you were back then, and today you wouldn't do what you did back then. But sharing with someone else might help them through their painful experience that they are experiencing right now.

Bad things happen to all of us. No one is exempt from pain, hurt and sadness. It doesn't matter if you are old, young, male, female, your race and where you live in the world. We all have to go through painful experiences in life that will forever shape us. You are now stuck with this experience, but how are you going to handle it?
It's not what happens to you that matters. It's what you are going to do about it?


Always be yourself, share your story and be a lighthouse for someone else.



                                                              www.karinglannstam.com






Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Are You Dealing With An Attention Seeker?

                                          "Distance yourself from people who crave attention.
                                                           Don't fall into their trap.
                                     You'll spend precious time where it won't count.
                                                                Love yourself."






When you have people around you that are needy, attention-seeking and toxic, it's very important that you take great care of yourself because these types of people will drain your energy with their constant drama and neediness.

If you can't get these people out of your life, I suggest that you limit your time with them.
You must have strong boundaries in place and stay away from getting involved in their drama, and attention - seeking behavior.
These people are very good at baiting you and getting you involved in their crazy-making behavior and it is really easy to fall for their sneaky tactics. Before you know it they have you on their hook, and you don't even know how it happened.

Attention-seekers want to always be the center of attention and they will quickly shift the conversation onto themselves and their stories. And what great stories they tell. Unfortunately their stories are often exaggerated to make them sound more important or sometimes totally fabricated. They do lie.

Some attention-seekers act like a rescuer, and they prey on people who has suffered misfortune, illness, injury or some sort of vulnerability. The attention-seeker will dash into rescue them from their suffering and then banks on the praise and attention that follows. The rescued person might become dependent on them, which can lead to the attention-seeker exploiting the relationship.

Unfortunately we often attract by our own actions. Or we will attract people that are on the same level of woundedness or emotional health as we are. Like attracts like.
If we are not complete. If there is some kind of wound or void in our life that we haven't dealt with, chances are that we might attract these kinds of people into our lives until we heal our own void or wound within.
If we avoid dealing with our own issue or our own ghosts from the past, we're going to date the person with the most issues so that we can work through our own issues until they are healed.
These people and these lessons will continue to show up until we look at them. There is nowhere to escape.

Some people are so used to chaos that they will continue to attract unpredictable people. It's because chaos is what feels comfortable for them. It's their normal. They would feel very uncomfortable if  people were predictable and without drama. It probably would be very boring to them.

Attention-seekers are like a 2-year old emotionally. These people are responding to early developmental  trauma in their life caused most often by neglect.

Attention is like a drug for attention-seekers. They will do whatever they have to do to get it. So the best way to handle an attention-seekers is to ignore them. This is the last thing they want you to do and this is why it's so effective.

If an attention-seeker is causing too much of a burden in your life, cut off contact, if possible or at least limit your interactions with this person as much as possible. Learn to walk away.

I was in a relationship with a narcissist for many years until I walked away from the relationship in 2012.  Narcissist are very much attention-seekers. They use people around them as narcissistic supply and they almost stop at nothing to try to get it. If you realize that a person is a narcissist and you start to ignore him/her they will definitely hate you, especially if they were hoping to get some attention from you.
When these people get their supply (attention) they are on a high. They are charming, charismatic and full of energy. Just like a drug addict. But these kinds of people will often become depressed and upset when they are not the center of attention. When people don't give them the attention and the praise (supply) that they so desperately want and need.

It's exhausting to be in a relationship with an attention-seeker. Their constant need to be the center of attention will make you exhausted.
People who crave attention are in reality the most fragile and insecure human being in the world.

In 2012 I walked away and cut off all contact with the narcissistic man that I had been in a relationship with for many years. I moved on with my life. I decided that I didn't want to be a dance partner any longer in his crazy making dance, and in March of 2012 I let him dance alone. 

I was no longer going to be available for any more dances.


What Can You Do?

When you are dealing with attention-seekers and crazymakers, it's important that you take an observers point of view. Don't allow yourself to get entangled in their mess and drama. 

Walk away if you can, or at least keep a healthy distance.

Take great care of yourself and work on your self-worth. Learn to validate yourself.


Check out my blog..... To Love Others You Must First Love Yourself

http://karinglannstam.blogspot.com/2019/06/to-love-others-you-must-first-love.html

Figure out if you have a high tolerance for toxic people and if you do, what is the reason for that?


If you have a void on the inside, or a wound that needs to heal, work on healing that wound. 

Chances are that if you understand and heal your wound, you will stop attracting attention-seeking and toxic people into your life.

Invest in people who invest in you.




                                                          www.karinglannstam.com