Monday, April 27, 2020

How To Get Unstuck And Start Moving Toward The Life Of Your Dreams

                                         You can't start the next chapter of your life,
                                              if you keep re-reading the last one.

I remember an incident that happened many years ago when I was in my early twenties. I was out driving in the country with one of my friends. At this time, I wasn't the most experienced driver. It was wintertime in Sweden and at this particular time that I am talking about, it was quite a bit of snow on the ground and very cold weather. I can't recall why my friend and I decided to take a drive in the country. Due to all the snow and ice roads, I wasn't driving very fast. As we were driving along and having a good time I decided to turn onto a very small and narrow road. I slowed down to make the turn but I didn't slow down enough. I didn't realize that the road I was going to turn onto was covered with ice. As I made the turn the next thing that happened was that the car hit the ice. I tried to keep the car on the road, but unfortunately the car started to slowly slide sideways, into the ditch. A few seconds later my friend and I looked at each other quite surprised at what had happened. We got out of the car. No one was hurt. Luckily for us a guy had seen what happened and he came over and offered to help pull us out of the ditch. We gladly accepted his help and a few minutes later he returned with his tractor. About fifteen minutes later the car was pulled out of the ditch without even a dent in it. We thanked the guy very much for pulling us out of the ditch

By now you might wonder.....where I am you going with this story?

Let me explain.
Think of the car as your own life. Sometimes in life we will end up in the ditch by some unforeseen incident, setback or crisis. Something happened that we didn't expect. Usually it is a loss of some kind that will get us off track and into the ditch. Maybe a divorce, death of a loved one, health problems, a severe illness, financial loss, job loss or betrayal just to name a few.

All of us will end up in the ditch at some time during our lifetime. No one will go through life without setbacks, obstacles and full blown crisis.
Do we remain in the ditch?
Of course not. We will look around and try to figure out how to get out of the ditch.

Unfortunately, I have met many people in my life and in my own coaching business that ended up in the ditch due to something that happened to them in their life. The sad thing is that 5, 10, 20 or even 50 years later they are still in the ditch. These are the people that will always tell you about how unfair everything is, how bad their life is, how terrible people are and how badly they been treated their whole life. And if it wasn't for bad luck, they wouldn't have had any luck at all.
Do you know someone like that? Or maybe it's sounds like YOU?

I get it that sometimes people can be very mean and they will do horrible things to us, but continuing to focus on what they did or didn't do, will only make us stay stuck in the ditch. And after a while no one will care that we are stuck in the ditch. The only people we will have around us are other people who are also living in the ditch. Birds of a feather will flock together.

                                        "Uncover the truth about where you are and  
                                you can begin to draw a map to where you desire to be."
                                                           - Valorie Burton

Now how do we get unstuck?
We get a tractor to pull us out. The tractor is representing a compelling future that we must create for ourselves. Something that will pull us forward when things get tough. We know where we are (stuck) but we must figure out where we want to go in the future.

What happened to that big dream that you had in your twenties or thirties? Maybe it's time to dust it off, create a game plan and then begin to take some new steps towards accomplishing your big dream? Maybe you need to set some goals and then take action on these goals? Maybe you must change our habits.?You must stop certain unhealthy habits and create better habits for yourself.
The solution(s) is the tractor. Yes, I am in the ditch right now, but what can I do now to get out of here?
Stop focusing and on the problem. Stop talking to everyone about the problem and start focusing on solution(s)

Without a vision for the future it will be easy for us to drift, get stuck and to remain stuck.

I speak from experience. I have been in the ditch many times. A few times it took a little while to get out of the ditch. In 2012 I had a complete smackdown that caught me off guard.  It was a huge betrayal by two people very close to me and it took sometime to heal from that one.

Sometimes I end up in the ditch over something very small. But if I relax and focus on where I want to go,  the next day I am usually back on track again. As we experience ending up in the ditch a few times, we usually get better at getting up, and we also usually get back up and back on track faster too.

If we have a great life plan for our life it is a lot easier to get out of the ditch and we won't remain there very long. If we don't have a life plan or we have allowed someone else to plan our life, we might stay stuck a lot longer and sometimes even forever. And we don't want that to happen.

Create an amazing vision for your life so that you won't be drifting. If you have a vison for your life, you know where you are going and if you happened to end up in the ditch you know that is only temporary and soon you will be out of the ditch and back on track again.

It's time to get unstuck and start moving towards the life of your dreams.


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