"Our most common unhealed core wounds are usually
sourced from the relationships we had with our parents, siblings, and ex-lovers."
- don Mateo Sol
Last week I got stung by a bee for the first time in many years. It hurt a little when it happened but then I didn't pay much attention to it. The next day my whole lower arm was red, swollen and warm to the touch. This bee sting made me feel quite uncomfortable for many days and I wanted it to heal quickly so that I could go back to feeling" normal" again.
About a week later it is almost gone except a little redness and some itching.
I guess you are wondering where I am going with this story about being stung by a bee?
Let's say that instead of a bee sting I got a cut on my arm. It was bleeding some and it hurt for a while. In a short while after getting this cut, the wound on my arm would try to close up and to heal. It is a very natural process.
If the cut didn't heal and close up it would soon cause all kinds of trouble. The disease process would begin and soon it would have started an infection..... if the wound or cut would continue to stay open.
If a cut or a wound never would close up.....than the person would eventually die if the infection spread to the rest of the body.
The natural tendency for a wound would be to close up and heal. Same thing with the bee sting that I got. After about a week the spot where I got stung has almost returned to normal.
Now let us look at the same thing more in the spiritual and the psychological dimension.
Most of us get wounded from our childhood.....and from our past. We were abused, abandoned, neglected. We weren't feeling loved and not taken care of. We sometimes even felt that we were taken advantage of. Our parents were maybe alcoholics, drug-abusers or gamblers. Maybe some were poor and maybe they were rich or whatever it was.....we all have this stuff in our past..... and the funny thing is that a lot of us will bond to it.
Sometimes we might use these old wounds from the past to get attention or we use it for pity and a lot of people will lead with their wounds.
When we meet someone new, it won't be long before we know that they weren't loved by anyone. They will tell us right away. Or maybe they were abused as a child. Their husband/wife left them for someone else. Their father/mother was an alcoholic and that is now why they are also an alcoholic.
I am sure that you have met someone in your life that immediately after you met them for the first time they started telling you all about how miserable their life is and how unfairly they had been treated by others.
It doesn't matter what it is..... but some people will keep holding on to these wounds and one of the reasons that we don't heal in our lives and why we don't manifest what we desire is because we are attached to these things in our past rather than saying to ourselves and others.....
"Whatever happened to me in the past, whatever lesson, I have learned from it.....I now got it!
I got the lesson.
And now since I got the lesson I no longer need to be attached to it and I can now stop and remove the poison from my body. I refuse to allow it to continue to spread in my body like a huge infection and preventing me from healing. I decide to let it go because I want to close the wound forever.
I want to heal."
Most people whose lives are not fulfilled with the things that they would like to see manifest in their lives are experiencing this..... because they are in the past hanging on to their wounds and refusing to allow them to heal. They keep on re-opening the same wound over and over again.
You hear a lot of people talking about their past and their old wounds. For example you might hear them say
"How can you talk to me about this when you don't understand the pain I have suffered in my life." "How can you possible say this after you know what I have been through as a child."
"You want me to forgive him?......I was only a child. I didn't do anything wrong."
If you don't do this to yourself you will do it others..... and it comes from this idea that all of us are entitled to a perfect childhood. What is a "Perfect" childhood anyway???
No one escapes their childhood without being wounded. But our parents, siblings, teachers and friends did their best. They didn't mean to wound us.
Back in 2012 after leaving a narcissistic abusive partner (that I had been in a relationship with for over 7 years), I was trying to understand what would make a person do something so mean and ugly to another person. I flooded my brain with information from books and articles about narcissism and narcissistic abuse. I listened to webinars and teleseminars about other people's experiences. I wanted to understand on a deeper level. I had been terribly wounded by the behavior of this person and I wanted to understand why he did what he did. I craved answers and I wanted to know so that I could later heal and then let it go.
It was during this year that the idea of having my own coaching business got started and in 2013 my idea became my new reality. I started my own coaching business. My experience has made my a lot stronger and I can now understand people on a lot deeper level than I would have been able to do if I had not gone through what I did for many years.
Because of what I went through I now have knowledge and experiences that are priceless. And all the knowledge that I have accumulated through books, webinars, other people and online articles has made it possible for me to understand and close the wounds of my past.
The fact is whatever you needed to go through in your life in order to get the lessons why you are here, you went through. And as you look back on all those things you can either say to yourself.....
"They taught me to be stronger" or you can say "Poor me" and continue to bleed with your wounds and keep them open.
If you continue to keep the wound open you it will eventually prevent you from ever feeling worthy of anything good in your life.
Close The Wound.....And Let It Go!
Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach