Monday, March 19, 2018

You Have To Participate In Your Own Rescue

                                               "The game of life has two participants,
                                                     spectators and players. Pick one."
                                                                    - Unknown


You are responsible for your own life. You are responsible for YOU.

Stop sitting around waiting on someone to come and rescue you.

Don't waste your time waiting on someone to fix you or to even help you.

You are the only one that have the power to take responsibility and to move your life forward.

You know..... life happens to all of us.
It rains on the poor and it rains on the rich.
The only question is.....what are you going to do about your life when difficult things happen?
When life didn't go as you planned?
When you lost a loved one or your business failed? Or your best friend betrayed you or your spouse divorced you? When you got struck by an illness or had to give up on the life that you had created?
Are you just going to sit around and feeling sorry for yourself? Or are you going to stand back up, brush yourself off and keep on walking?

You know.....what you decide to do is entirely up to you.



Unfortunately many people will allow a setback, loss or difficulties to cripple them and keep them stuck, causing them to miss out on the next chapter in their life.

I think that a lot of us know that change is necessary in order for us to grow and to move to the next level of our lives. Yet, we sometimes simply refuse to address it.
We postpone making decisions to another day.  

Stop looking at the closed door. Turn around and face the open door.
Have faith that what lies in front of you is bigger than what you left behind.
Start focusing on the wonderful possibilities that lie ahead.


Create a plan.
You must take charge of your own life and quickly get back on track. You might not have the perfect plan but you can figure out the next step, even if it's not perfect.
The longer you stay stuck, the harder it will be to get going again.

Study, learn, reflect as much as you can.
It will help you move along and it will help you understand what is going on.
There isn't anything that you can't find out. If you don't know...... google it.
Read books and articles. Listen to seminars and podcasts. Join a support group where you live or you can also find them online.
Get a mentor, hire a coach or a therapist.
Learn and then apply the new knowledge and your new understanding. Become a student of your own life. Sort through everything and keep the necessary knowledge.
You must learn a new way to think before you can master a new way to be.
Pay attention.

Action is key.
Not much will happen if you don't apply what you learn.
Sitting on the coach or staying in bed,  is not going to get you where you want to go.
Do the inner work and put yourself back together..... piece by piece.
Design and build your life. Commit to staying on your new path.
There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.


When my own life imploded back in 2012 this is exactly what I was doing. I knew that I had to care enough about myself to get back up and create a new life for myself.  Everything changed within 4 months and there was very little left of my old life.
I knew that no one was going to create a new life for me and no one was going to do the work for me. Only I could do it. I was responsible for rescuing myself from the situation that I was now sitting in.
This is how I started my own coaching business.

I have written a book about my experience back in 2012.
If you haven't read my book..... Bounce Don't Break..... I recommend it.It tells you how to quickly get back on track after life knocks you down.
You can order it at Amazon in The US and in a lot of countries in Europe.


So stop sitting on the sidelines of your life.
Get in the game and start playing again.
In the end.....you will be glad that you did.



                                                          www.karinglannstam.com


Wednesday, March 14, 2018

Your Time Is Limited, So Don't Waste It

                                        "It has been my observation that most people
                                             get ahead during the time others waste."
                                                              - Henry Ford



To be productive you must learn to control interruptions.

The biggest interruption today is the phone.



Most people can not resist answering a ringing phone, text message or email.

The phone is an essential part of our lives and we look upon the phone as a social tool.

It's something that we look forward to because we associate it with fun and we also remember back when we were young...... we associated a phone call with romance because we got calls from our boyfriend/girlfriend.

As adults we have to change our thinking and especially during our working hours.
If you are in the middle of doing something important and you get interrupted by a phone call, text or email and you stop working and answer the call, text or email, it can take you as long as 25 minutes to be able to get back to concentrating on what you were doing before you answered the call.

And if the phone call was about something upsetting or negative you might not be able to let go off it at all during the day. Your mind will constantly go back to what was said during the phone call.

Learn to control interruptions. Don't be a slave to your phone. If it's important people will call back or even better call them back at the end of your day when you are through working on your project. That way they won't interrupt your concentration and your flow and you can control the time.

Most people are time wasters. The majority of people have no goals. They have no priorities, no plans and they have no concern about becoming successful and they think that you are the same.

They think that because their time isn't worth anything, therefore they don't think that your time is worth anything either.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it.





Monday, March 12, 2018

The Core Of Success

                                 "The tragedy of life doesn't lie in NOT reaching your goals.
                                           The tragedy lies in having no goals to reach."
                                                             - Benjamin Mays


The core of success..... GOALS.

Have clear, specific and written goals.

All goals must be in writing. You must re-write them. You must define them and re-define them.

Carry your goals around with you.
Keep them in your pocket or in a notebook that you take with you, wherever you go.




What are your goals?

What is it that you want to be?
Or to have?
Or do?

What is it that you want to accomplish in the next 1, 3, 5 or 10 years?

The top 3% of people in every field have clear specific goals for their lives.
The rest of the population have either very vague goals or no goals at all.


Here are a few major questions to ask yourself.

Who am I?
Where am I going?
What do I want to accomplish?

There are 3 major areas of goals that you have to think about.

1. Your personal and your family goals.
What do your want to accomplish for yourself and your family?

2. Your business, your career, financial and your material goals.
What is that you want to accomplish in the external world?
What do you want to contribute to?

3. Your personal or self development goals.
Your ability and your willingness to grow and develop yourself is the key to accomplish everything else.


Here are 3 excellent questions to ask yourself.

Question number one
What would you do, what goal would you set for yourself if you just won a million dollars?
What would you want, or be or have if you all of a sudden were given one million dollars?
What would you do if you had all the time, money and you were completely free to do anything that you wanted to do?
What would you do differently if you had this money?

Here is question number two
What would you do if you learned today that you only had 6 months to live?
What would you stop doing?
What would you start doing?
Who would you spend time with?
The answer to this question will tell you what you really value and what is really important to you.

Question number three
What great thing would you dare to dream if you knew you could not fail?
If you knew that success was going to happen no matter what you did, what big dream would you dare to dream?
What big goal would you set for yourself?
Answering this question will tell you the one thing that you were put on this earth to accomplish.

Give these three questions some thought!


                                                         www.karinglannstam.com





Wednesday, March 7, 2018

The Magic Word

                                       "It's only by saying "NO" that you can concentrate
                                                on the things that are really important."
                                                                 - Steve Jobs


In time management there is one magic word.

The word is NO.




Learn to say NO to activities, tasks, responsibilities, obligations that do not contribute to the most important goals that you set for yourself.

NO is really a magic word and the place and the time to use this word is early in a conversation and often.

It's simply amazing how much of  our time is taken up by people that are asking you to do things..... and you do these things out of a sense of obligation.

Unfortunately most people don't value their own time so they don't value yours.

How can we deal with a person that we normally like and respect when they ask us to do something?

When someone asks you to do something, take on a project or to be on a committee.....simply say..... let me think about it, and I'll get back to you.

If someone is pressing you for a decision.....simply explain to them that you cannot make a decision right now and that you have to think about it.

After you thought about if for 24 hours, call them back and tell them that you thought about it and that you simply don't have the time, but you thank them for thinking of you.


                                              "Learn to say "NO" to the good,
                                                 so you say "YES to the best."
                                                           - John Maxwell


Just say NO.

In time management the word NO is one of the most powerful words there is.

It will save you hours, days, weeks and months of working on projects that contributes nothing to your goals.

When you are saying YES to others, make sure that you are not saying NO to yourself.


                                                             www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, March 5, 2018

Always Find Time To Do What Makes You Feel Happy And Alive

                                                 "Don't ask what the world needs;
                                         ask yourself what makes you come alive. 
                                                     And then go and do that.
                           Because what the world needs is people who come alive."
                                                        - Harold Whitman


Have you done anything lately that will make you feel truly happy and alive?

Maybe you have forgotten what makes you feel happy and alive?

So often we allow life to take over and we get so busy that we stop doing the things that would make us truly happy. The things that will energize us and make us feel great.



Remember when you were a kid, it was all about fun and play. But for some reason as we get a little older we forget how to have fun and we forget how to play.
Life takes over and we think that everything has to be so serious.

Maybe you tell yourself ..... "I can do that any longer, I am adult now" or "what would people think if I do this, it's too childish" or "what about if I look stupid doing it or I can't do it?" and the reasons and the excuses go and on and on and you probably won't do it because you think you are too old, too out of shape or you are afraid of looking foolish in front of others.

Let me give you an example of what I am talking about.

This past Saturday I was working together with 2 other adults and 4 children and since it was a lot of snow and cold weather we decided to go sledding for an hour, so the kids could have some fun.
Now here was the problem....I had not gone sledding in over 30 years. I was standing on top of the hill with the sled in my hand telling myself all the excuses that I mentioned earlier.
Why I couldn't do it or why I shouldn't even try it.

I stood there for a few minutes discussing it with another adult that was also hesitating if she dared to sled down the hill, but we decided....what the heck....let's do it!
So off she went down the hill and I followed right after her.

Ohhh....It was a lot of fun!!!!
Let me tell you..... the adults had more fun the kids. We kept on climbing the small hill and off we went. Just having so much fun. At the end of the hour the kids were watching the adults sledding down the hill over and over again. We seemed to have more fun than the kids as we were screaming, laughing and cheering each other on..




I believe that as adults we have forgotten what makes us truly feel truly alive.
A lot of times we are sleepwalking through life and most of the time we are on auto pilot. In other words we have stopped doing the things that would bring a lot of fun, laughter and joy into our lives in a natural way and instead we have come to rely on artificial ways of improving our mood..... substances like sugar, caffeine, food, alcohol, drugs and behaviors like shopping, gambling, constantly surfing the internet, working too much... in a way to bring our mood up and to get the dopamine, serotonin and endorphins to flow in our bodies.

The problem is that all these ways of trying to improve on our mood and to make up for a lack of energy might end up hooking us and we will eventually get addicted to them in order to feel good all the time. The problem with addiction is that we might only need a small dose in the beginning but as time goes on we will most likely require bigger and bigger doses to get the same feeling again.
Short term gain that will lead to long term pain.

We settle for things that will give us some pleasure and satisfaction in the short term, instead of creating something that will give us pleasure all the time or in the long run.

It's not that we are having less energy, inspiration and motivation as adults. Most of the time we have stopped doing the things that will give us energy in a healthy way. The things we used to really enjoy doing when we were younger.
Instead we end up on the couch in the evening, watching hour after hour of TV or surfing the internet instead of actually engage in things that would give us a boost of energy naturally. We have come to rely on poor substitutes to be able to make up for low energy levels.
Yes..... it takes a little effort on our part and the willingness to take the first step.
The willingness to make and effort to change the habits that are not working and replace them with habits that are working.

I often hear people say...." I am so bad at getting together with my friends and in the evening I am just too tired to even call. I rather just sit on the couch." And then they wonder why they don't have any friends.
Sitting on the couch every evening won't bring up you energy level and it won't make you feel alive.

Everything start with you.
You must be willing to change what you do on a daily basis. In other words you must take a good look a your habits and then make a decision on how what you want to feel in the future.
Decide that you are no longer willing to accept low energy and that you are no longer going to try to bring up your energy level by engaging in addictive behaviors. Instead you are now going to discover what truly makes you feel happy and alive and then decide to this instead on a daily base to feel more energized.

When was the last time you dance or sang like no one was listening or watching?
When was the last time you actually went out for coffee with a friend that you haven't seen in a while?
When was the last time you played music..... really loud?
When was the last time you called an old friend or relative?
When was the last time you spent some time in nature?
When was the last time you went to the movies?
When was the last time you walked on a beach?
How about volunteering? There are a lot of people that could use some help.
How about starting your own business?
How about a new hobby, like Salsa dancing, take singing lessons or join a choir.
How about learning a new language?
Try yoga classes or learn how to meditate
How about paining or start writing that book that you have been talking about for years?
How about starting a blog?
When was the last time that you did some travelling?
Gardening is fun, spend some time with your pets, decide on a weekly date-night with your partner
Re-decorate your house.
Join a new group. Get to know some new people.
Start a gratitude journal
Get in shape
Study personal development
Take a computer class
Smile
This list can get very long so I will stop now, because I think you will get the idea.

Doing these things will bring up your energy level naturally and the more you engage in some of these activities the more energy you will eventually get.
You can start small and work your way up to more and bigger things.

Don't settle for things that will only give you pleasure, energy and happiness in the short term.
Create activities and fun in your life that will give you happiness and aliveness in the long run.

Set some new goals, move your body, connect with people and get out of your comfort zone.

Find time to do the things that will make you happy and alive.


                                                       www.karinglannstam.com

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Finish What You Start

                              "Once you start something, don't stop until you complete it.
                                    Don't let excuses, problems, hard work or anything
                                                 stop you from completing it."
                                                         - Sonya Parker


Are you someone that would like to set some new goals?
Maybe write a book, or start a blog, maybe paint or something else?

Why haven't you started the project?

Are you having a hard time getting started?
Or have you started but you can't seem to finish the task or the project?

Did you know that completing a task will increase your self-esteem and your self-confidence?




Set a goal
Make a plan
Start working
Finish the project

Complete the task.....start and finish.

The most incredible thing about task completion is whenever you complete a task, it gives you a burst of endorphins.
It makes you happy. It makes you feel powerful and it energizes you. It really makes you feel strong.

Any completed task is a source of self-esteem and self-confidence. It will make you feel like a winner.

If you have a list of daily things to do..... always start with the biggest and most important task.
The bigger the task..... the greater feeling of personal power and self-esteem you will have.

When you develop a habit of starting and completing tasks you will feel fantastic about yourself, all the time.
Your self-confidence goes up and you know that you can do anything that you put your mind to, because you have proven it to yourself over and over again.

It's not that you hope that you can complete a task, you have done it and you do it regularly.

Set priorities.
Choose the most important task and finish it.



                                                        www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, February 26, 2018

Your Environment Will Influence You

                                                             "People are like plants.
                                             They grow and they change every day."
                                                                - Cutis Jackson


Since spring-time is almost upon us I was thinking of gardening, planting and beautiful flowers, this morning.
I don't know about you, but I love the outdoors and gardening is one of my favorite things to do.
Soon it will be time to go and to pick the beautiful flowers that you are going to plant in your garden this year.




When you go to the store to buy a flower that you are going to plant in the ground or in a pot, you will usually pick a flower that is healthy and strong. Then you will buy some new and fresh soil to put the plant in.

If a healthy and strong flower isn't planted in good soil it is not going to be able to bloom and become all that it can be.
The problem isn't the flower but the soil that it's put in. And if the soil is filled with rocks, weeds and roots it's going to be very difficult for the flower to grow and reach it's full potential.
You wouldn't forget to water your plant either with water and some nutrients and you would make sure that it got the sunshine that it needed.

Same thing if you plant a flower in a too small of a pot, it won't be able to grow and become all that it could be. It might survive but it's not going to he strong and healthy.

Same principle in life.
Think of yourself as this beautiful flower filled with potential, gifts, talents but if you plant yourself in unhealthy soil, and what I refer to when I mean soil is your environment.
If your environment and the people that you surround yourself with is limited, it will be very difficult for you to reach your full potential.

If your friends, work or your surroundings are like weeds, rocks and roots, then they will eventually pull you down.
They will soon choke the life out of the flower. It will not be able to grow and expand and to become all that you can be.
It's not that it's something wrong with the flower. The problem is the soil.

Weeds, rocks and roots are things like that friends that are negative or the co-workers that sit around and gossip every day, your angry boss that always blames you for everything or it can be your own family-members that don't believe in your dream and your potential.

If you hang around negative and pessimistic people it will eventually choke the life out of your flower.

In other words.....the environment that you put yourself in is extremely important.
No matter how good the flower is, it's dependent on having good soil to grow in. 

You must be selective with whom you give your time, energy and attention to, because you will eventually become like the people that you spend your time with.
Negativity, pessimism, complaining, envy, jealousy, anger, bitterness and gossiping is contagious. If you are not careful you might catch it from other people.

If your friends have limited thinking, no dreams, no goals or no motivation..... that narrow-minded thinking is going to rub off on you.

Stop hanging around people that don't have anything that you want.
If they don't inspire you to grow and to make yourself want to become better.....you need to make some changes.
Their negativity is contaminating the soil.

Look around you...... what is influencing you?
What are you spending time and energy on?
Did you plant your flower in good soil or is your soil being contaminated with what you watch, what you are constantly thinking about and by who you are spending time with?

Do you know of some people that are pulling you down?

Why haven't you already walked away from these people?

Why won't you make a change?

Now the problem with not making a change is that you will get stuck where you are.
You can't grow in bad soil.

If you don't get rid of the wrong people.....the right people will never show up in your life.

The Universe will never ask you to give up something without giving your plenty back.
You might have to go through a time of being lonely but the Universe will give you new friends that will pull you up..... instead of pulling you down.

What are you holding onto in your own life right now that you know that you should have let go off long time ago?

Does your vision increase when you are among your friends.....or does it decrease?
Choose the right environment, friendships and mindsets. Don't hang around can't do it people. Connect with dreams.
Find some good mentors. People that are further along on the journey than you are. You need people that will pull you into your destiny.

Keep your environment healthy.




                                                             www.karinglannstam.com



Wednesday, February 21, 2018

How Do You Become A Great Problem Solver?

                                           "Whether you think you can or can't
                                                    you're probably right."
                                                        - Henry Ford


How do you become a great problem solver?
You focus on the solution(s) rather then the problem. 




The majority of people continue to focus on the problem.
The spend all their energy thinking about the problem, talking about the problem and staying awake at night, worrying about the problem.

Instead of focusing on the problem, you think intensely about solutions, all the time.

What is that the average person think about when a problem arises?
Who did it?.....and who's to blame?
They are focused on the past and on the problem.

But the thing is that you cannot change a past even. The problem has already occurred, so now it's reality and the only question is....what can you do about it? How do you solve it? What is your next action?

When you constantly think in terms of solutions you will become more creative. You will become smarter and brighter and you will become better and better at solving problems in the future.

And when you are solving problems and discussing different choices and alternatives, you become more positive, powerful and influential. 

So think about solutions instead of blame.

When you think about blame it shuts down your brain.
Your creativity gets shut down. It makes you negative. It makes you angry and it makes you a negative influence on others.

So think about solutions.


What is the biggest problem that you are facing right now....in your life?
Identify the problem, then ask.....what is the solution?

What are all the possible solutions to this problem?

The more solutions that you can think of, the more likely you are to come up with a great one.

Unfortunately most people are passive. They have a problem and they accept it.

Pro-active people identify the problem that is causing them unhappiness and frustration and then they figure out a way to solve the problem.

They ask other people, the do research online, they read books and they try different things.


Be a great problem solver by focusing on solutions instead of focusing on the problem. 


                                                            www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, February 19, 2018

Life Is To Be Experienced..... Pain And Pleasure.

                  "The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure, 
                                          instead of having it use you.
                             If you do that, you are in control of your life.
                                         If you don't, life controls you."
                                               - Anthony Robbins



Nature had designed two sensors PAIN and PLEASURE.

The reason behind this is to help lower forms in nature, like animals to go in the right direction.

When we are doing the right thing, we will feel pleasure. Nature encourages us to go this way because it leads us to feeling pleasure.

We are usually feeling pain when something is threatening our survival and we are not being supported. Pain means that it's the wrong way. Do something different.




As humans beings when we find ourselves dealing with problems, crisis or are maybe experiencing trauma in our lives, we will naturally seek a way to get out of it.

But if you can't seek or find a way out of it, than we do some other behavior to lessen the pain, because if you can't move and you are stuck in pain.....what are you suppose to do? Just remain in the pain?

At this point we can put in some other kind of  behavior and override the current experience. We find a way to deal with the pain.....even if it's only temporarily.

Where do we notice this in life? Addiction.

In addiction a person is really just trying to solve or to overcome some kind of pain in their life or some kind of threat for their survival or existence, and they choose another alternative behavior.
Something that will lessen the pain and the threat for a while.

Unfortunately the alternative behavior doesn't necessarily take us of the problem. So we remain in the problem, even though we are mentally trying to get out of the problem. And this will eventually create more and usually bigger problems.

We are trying to solve a problem or pain with something that will later cause us even greater pain.
What we tried to solve the initial pain with, will cause us much greater pain down the road.

We are not paying attention and we are often not willing to look at the original pain so therefore we are continuing to live in this dream world.

Unfortunately the problem that arises from alternative reality, sometimes has more and more negative consequences for us and our lives than the original problem.
We are trying to feel better and lessen the pain.....even if it's only for the moment.

People will find a way to reduce and sometimes completely avoid the pain of the situation and then this new way becomes habitual.
It has now become the "new daily normal." 

Why does this happen? 
Because if we start to feel the same pain again, we will automatically go back and check and find out what allowed us to avoid the pain....and then we do this other behavior that now will be our "new" habit whenever we are starting to feel pain again.


Are you dealing with situations, problems or new or past life-experiences in your life with some type of addictive behavior or substance?

A great definition of addiction is.....something that you will continue to do in your life, and that you won't give up even though it's bringing negative consequences to your life.

Short term gain for long term pain.


So the question is.....what pain are you trying to avoid in your own life?





                                                      www.karinglannstam.com

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

3 Benefits You Will Get From Taking The First Step Towards Your Goal

                               "The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide
                                   that you are not willing to stay where you are."
                                                      - Unknown


Taking the first step is always the hardest thing to do.

It doesn't matter what you are trying to accomplish.....the first step is always the most difficult one. Getting started is hard.

First ask yourself......what do I have to do today to begin to create the life that I want?
What would be the first step?

You can always see the first step.
You will always know that you should start doing more of this and start doing less of that.
Or start doing something new or stop doing something that you are already doing.
But the thing is.....you can always see the first step.





Today I want to share 3 benefits that you will get once you take that first step.

The first benefit is that you get feedback.
Feedback will allow you to self-correct.
All of life is a process of experimenting and getting feedback.
Changing and correcting.

The second benefit is that you will get new ideas.
There is something about taking action that will trigger your creativity.
It will make you smarter because it will activate more of your brain. Sitting around being passive doesn't do anything for you.
But taking action will light up your brain.

The third benefit is that taking action will give you confidence.
Your own self-confidence goes up.
The more actions you take in the direction of your goals, the more confidence you will have, the more creative you are, the more energy you will have and the happier you will feel.


The top 20% of people in any society are proactive. They are constantly taking action.
The bottom 80% are passive. They are waiting for someone else to come and tell them what to do.


Don't Wait. Be Proactive. Take The First Step Today!


                                                           www.karinglannstam.com

Monday, February 12, 2018

Don't Forget To Love Yourself

                                                 "If you want to soar in life,
                                                you must first learn to F.L.Y.
                                                     (First Love Yourself)"
                                                         - Mark Sterling


Today..... I want you to start a new thing in your life.....Love Yourself!

Self love, self care or self compassion......whatever you choose to call it.....it doesn't matter.

What matters is that you actually start doing it for you. Nobody else.

You do it because you do matter, and you do deserve it.

What does it mean to practice self love?





Here are 6 TIPS

1. Take good care of yourself
Set some time aside to spend by yourself. The world around us is very noisy and busy and we must allow some quiet time for ourselves.
Learn to meditate. Or maybe just have some time each day to reflect on your life. Journaling is another great idea.
Make sure that you get enough sleep. Most people need between 7-9 hours of sleep.

2. Fitness/Nutrition
Make sure that you move your body. You don't have to go to the gym if you don't like that. A nice relaxing walk is perfect. Do something that you enjoy doing because if you don't, you probably will quit after a while. Do something that you can stick to.
Have you tried yoga? If you don't want to attend a class you can do it a home. Find a book on yoga or google some yoga poses online. If you prefer to do yoga with some music, go to YouTube. There you can find plenty of relaxing music to use.
Choose food that will give you energy. An apple is a lot better than a candy bar or soda.
Be smart....eat food that will give you long term energy, not just a quick fix.

3. Family/Relationships
Take good care of your relationship. Be present with people. Get together in person. Call people instead of just sending a text or FB message. Spend time with your spouse or partner. Have a once-a-week date night. Go out for coffee with your friends. Get off line. Sit down to dinner without electronic devices. Be an active listener. Be present and pay attention.

4. Who do you spend time with?
You become like the 5 people that you spend most of your time with. Make sure that the people that you are spending time with are high quality people. Only have people in your life that you like and respect.
Letting go of negative people doesn't mean that you hate them. It means that you love yourself.

5. Take care of your finances.
Stay away from debt. Create freedom in your life by saving money. If you don't have a savings account......open one today. Start saving something every month. Start small. It's not the amount that counts....it's the habit. Stop buying things that you really don't need.
Next time you are tempted to buy something ask yourself.....is this going to bring value to my life?

6. Expand you comfort zone.
Learn something new. Set some new goals. Go out there and meet some new people. Start a new hobby. Happiness = Growth. We are happier when we are stretching and growing.
It's time to stimulate your brain and your soul by learning something new.


What would happen if you devoted this year to loving yourself more?



Wednesday, February 7, 2018

No One Is Too Busy In This World....It's All About Priorities

                                                                  Priorities;
                                    When someone tells you that they are too "busy".....
                                                It's not a reflection of their schedule;
                                      it's a reflection of YOUR spot on their schedule.
                                                      - Dr. Steve Maraboli


We are living in a world that is getting busier by the day.

Everyone and everything is trying to get our attention, all the time. And if we are not careful we will end up spending our own precious time on things that in the end won't matter and it won't help us to develop our own potential and what we are really here on this earth to do.

In other words a lot of us we allow other people's agendas to come before our own and a lot of times it will prevent us from accomplishing our own dream. We put our own dream on the back burner in favor of always being there for others and neglecting ourselves and our own deepest dreams and desires.

In a way we are starving our own soul and it will eventually create a void in our life that we might start to fill with unhealthy choices, instead of feeding our soul with the food that it is longing and staving for.



We all have exactly the same amount of time each day. So what are you doing with your time?
Are you investing in yourself?
Whatever you are doing.... how you spend your time, tells me who you are.

How much time do you spend on working on you?
How much time do you spend on working on your dream?
In the last 90 days, how many books have your read?
In the last year, what new skill or knowledge did you acquire?
What kind of investment have you made in you?


Challenge your schedule for a minute and ask yourself.....are you really being productive or is your life cluttered with all kinds of demands that drains you from being your highest and best self?

Are you substituting business and all the chaos that comes along from business, from actually being productive?

It takes time to be creative and it takes time to create something in your life.
We were meant to be creative during our short time here on earth.
You have a lot of creativity and if you had time you would be creative...right?

The truth is....nobody is too busy, it's just a matter of priorities.


The most important thing is to value your time.

So what are you going to do with you time?

What are you going to do today?



Monday, February 5, 2018

Why Trying To Change People Is A Really Bad Idea

                                "Real love is excepting other people the way they are
                                             without trying to change them.
                                                 If we try to change them,
                                             this means we don't like them."
                                                     - Don Miguel Ruiz


If you are constantly trying to change other people, you will set yourself up for a lifetime of suffering.
The truth is that we can never change other people. They can only change themselves.
And the only people that we can truly change is ourselves.

So stop walking around hoping and wishing that somebody will all of a sudden just change....they probably won't. And no amount of begging, complaining and criticizing will help. 
Allow people to be who they are.




How many times have you heard about relationships that as soon as the man/woman entered the relationship they started to work on trying to change the other person?
If you don't like they way someone is....then why did you enter into the relationship in the first place?

Early childhood experiences affect us the rest of our lives. Most of us didn't have a "perfect childhood"...whatever that is?
Our parents did their best with what they knew and had to give us.
But if you grew up with parents that were negative, critical, suspicious, demanding, unsupportive, addictive and shouting at you all the time, chances are that you, yourself will develop some of these characteristics. Why is that?

The first years of our lives up to the age of seven, forms the personality of the adult and it's very difficult to change an adult if you were around these kinds of people mentioned above.

On the other hand if you were around parents that were nurturing, supportive, attentive, caring and kind, you will probably develop similar characteristics as an adult.
What happened during the first seven years will determine they way that people will be as adults.

The basic rule is that people don't change. People don't change their basic character and personality after the age of sixteen to seventeen.
They are in a way fixed in their personality.

People can learn new skills and become more confident, but they usually don't change their personality.
If they are negative when they are 16-17 years old, they will be negative when they are 37 or 57.

The rule is......don't expect people to change and don't try to change them.
Don't hope that they will change, just accept people for the way they are.
If you are trying to change someone, you will be the person end up suffering, because most people are not going to change.

You can encourage people to develop their potential, but don't judge people or demand anything from people. Allow people to be who they are.

So what happens to the people that do actually change?
Because we know that some people will make drastic changes in their lives all of a sudden.

It is usually something that happens in people's lives, like a huge chock that sends them into a new kind of thinking and looking at things.
The old way of being and doing things isn't working anymore.


Check out my Blog ........Can People Change?


Miracles do happen to people, and will force them to change their way......but the bad thing is that you can't count on them.
The idea that someone will change is a miracle and you cannot base your life, your work and decisions on this.

If you are in business, the rule is that you only hire nice people and people that you like.
Don't try to make eagles out of ducks.
If you work with a negative person, it will take all the enjoyment out of your work. 

Decide that you are not going to work with difficult people.
Don't have them as clients and customers and finally.....don't marry them!!!

So in the end, you cannot change other people.
You have no power over other people and really you don't have the right to change others.

The only thing you have power and control over is changing yourself.

So save yourself a lot of suffering by allowing people to be who they are.


                                                           www.karinglannstam.com