Stop Staying Stuck in Disempowering Relationships and Situations

Is there something in your life that you are unhappy with right now?

How long have you been feeling unhappy about it?

Why haven´t you done anything about it?

If you don´t like it........Change it!!!!!

Stop expecting other people, situations or circumstances to be a certain way so that you can be the way you want to be.

 I was married to an alcoholic for 16 years and I was always waiting for him to change. Well, that didn't  happen. In relationships we often want the other person to change to make us feel a certain way. In other words we are making the another person responsible for the way we feel.
That is giving that other person a lot of power.
You are basically saying....I can´t feel a certain way unless you change.
We can´t make other people change. Only they can.
We can only change OURSELVES.




Lets take happiness as an example. I can only be happy if someone changes their behavior or treats me a certain way. I can only be happy if I have more money. I can only be happy if I am in a relationship. I can only be happy if I lose 25 pounds. We are allowing something "out there" to decide for us, when we can be happy.
Here is the truth...You and only YOU are responsible for your own happiness.

Instead of wanting the other person to change we might want to ask ourselves......Why am I staying in a loveless relationship with a person that obviously is having a problem with an addiction and doesn´t treat me well?  Why am I allowing this person to control the way I feel? Why am I not doing anything to try to change the situation? (Hard questions I had to ask myself)

                               "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"
                                                            - Eleanor Roosevelt

The same thing can be said about circumstances.
Right now I am living in Sweden. Well...if you have never lived here ...let me tell you about the weather....It isn´t that great. Of course if  you like a lot of rainy and gloomy days and don´t want it too be hot....it might be a perfect place for you.
I happen to love sunshine and warm weather. But since I am here right now  I can´t stop doing things and waiting to do them until the sun pops out. I would be waiting around for a long time. (especially this time of the year.)

Your circumstances are the way they are right now. But if you don´t like them......start taking some action steps today that will change your circumstances. You might not be responsible for why you ended up in this situation Sometimes things happen that we have no power over. But you can absolutely control how you deal with the situation and the action you are taking to change them.

Stop staying stuck in disempowering situations, relationships, thought patters and bad habits.

Stop waiting for somebody or something "out there" to change.... before you can feel a certain way.

You are in control....You can change today!

You just have to decide that you want to change.

                                         Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach
                                                    www.karinglannstam.com
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Do You Ever Feel Resistance?

Since I have had a few weeks off I finally had a chance to catch up on some my reading. One of the books that I have been looking forward to read was
"The war of art" written by Steven Pressfield.
Ever since he was interviewed by Oprah on Super Soul Sunday, I have been wanting to get my hands on this book and finally I had the chance to read it. Great book by the way, and that is why I am writing about it in my blog today.

The book talks about breaking through the blocks and win your inner creative battles.
Resistance is one of those blocks. I know we all feel resistance sometimes. Especially when we are going to venture out of the ordinary in our lives and try or create something new. Sometimes we are not even conscious of our own resistance.

Ex. some people feel resistance every time they have to work out. Have you ever felt resistance when you have decided to start a new healthy diet? Painters feel resistance when they sit down in front of a blank canvas to create art. I can imagine song writers and film makers feel the same thing..........
Resistance when you are going to create something new.

I know I feel it a lot of times when I am going to write a blog. I sit in front of my computer and stare at a blank screen. Some days I don´t know what the topic of the blog is going to be and some days I have it planned out days and sometimes weeks in advance. But every time I sit down I do feel some sort of resistance. The sad thing is that it won´t go away the more you write. It is always there. Some days more than others.

Today I want to share some words from this wonderful book

Are you a born writer? Were you born on earth to be a painter, a scientist, an apostle of peace? In the end the question can only be answered by action.
Do it or don´t do it.
It may help to think of it this way. If you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony or crack cold fusion and you don´t do it, you not only hurt yourself, even destroy yourself.
You hurt children. You hurt me. You hurt the planet.
You shame the angels who watch over you and you spite the Almighty, who created you and you only with your unique gifts, for the some purpose of nudging the human race one millimeter further along its path to God.
Creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. It´s a gift to the world and every being in it. Don´t cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you`ve got.

                                                                       From The War of Art......by Steven Pressfield

By the way......I felt resistance this morning writing this blog. But I just pressed on and got it done.

 

                                        Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach
                                                   www.karinglannstam.com

It is Time to Uncover Your Dreams

Today I woke up to only 34 degrees outside, here in Alvesta, Sweden.....Brrrrrr..... It is getting cold for a girl like me that has spent half her life in hot and steamy Houston and Austin, TX.

I absolutely love this time of the year. Since I have lived in Texas, October has always been my favorite month. I just love all the fall colors, the pumpkins and I also enjoy the more relaxed energy of the fall months. During the spring months we are always so busy getting ready for summer. Planting the seeds, getting our yards ready for a long hot summer and also planning our vacations. I remember the first couple of years in Houston, I was just trying to survive the summer with all the heat and humidity!!!!!

Coming into October it becomes more relaxed, if you are following the rhythm of nature. Also when you live in a hot climate like we have in Houston, it is such a relief when the first cool fronts start to arrive and when we are finally getting some cool winds blowing again after several months of 95-100 degrees temperatures.

Another reason why I love fall is Halloween....I absolutely love it. I always say...."Halloween is a time when adults can act like kids again and get away with it." No one will judge you in your crazy outfit with an even more crazy wig on.

I was born and raised in Sweden and when I was young we never celebrated Halloween so the first time I got to experience Halloween was in 1987. I had just arrived from Sweden to Atlanta, GA, two months earlier and I had no idea what Halloween was about. Well.... did I ever found out. I went "trick or treating" for the first time in my life. I saw all these kids in crazy outfits running around so excited, adults also dressed up in outfits and I was amazed at all the ways people had decorated their houses with pumpkins, ghosts, spiders and all the rest of the things that will make your house look like a "haunted house". It simply blew me away. I had never seen anything like it. It seemed like everyone had such a great time and I absolutely loved it. I can still remember that evening and it always brings me lot of joy just thinking about it. I thought that the adults did such a fantastic job in decorating their houses and dressing up and acting like kids. I was totally amazed. Of course it probably didn't take much to impress a young girl like me that had just arrived from Sweden two months earlier.

I am sure that you are all wondering by now where I am going with this blog.....
My point is......often we forget how it is to have fun, laugh and act like a kid again. Do something silly and laugh at ourselves without feeling embarrassed or stupid.

Do you remember when you were a kid and you had big dreams? Things that you were going to do in your life? What happened to those dreams? Did you forget about them? Do you think that they sound silly and stupid since you have gotten older?
Did you allow other people to talk you out of pursuing your dream? Did you allow other people´s agenda and dreams to become more important than yours? Do you feel fear and doubt just thinking about getting our of your comfort zone and trying something new?

A lot of times we stop dreaming and we bury those dreams so deep down that only a backhoe will be able to dig them up!!! But your dreams are not dead, you just need to get them off "life support"... get that backhoe and dig them up. Start writing that book or that music that has been on your mind for years, start that business that you have been thinking about since you were in your twenties, Go out there and start dating again. Whatever it is for you.......Don´t wait any longer.

It is time to uncover those dreams. They have been "On Hold" long enough. Be like a child again...I know you can still act like one!!!!.... And start dreaming again. Dream big.....Get the excitement back in your life....Create a vision and then be courageous and act on it. Whatever you do.....Don´t let those dreams die within you!

I believe Jim Rohn said it best....."Discipline weighs ounces.....Regrets weigh tons"

Don´t die with regrets...wishing you would have been more brave......it is never too late to pursue your dream!

People in this world are looking for you......they want your knowledge. They need your experience and expertise. They need and want what you have...... and only you have it!!!
Remember you are unique......there is no one in this world like you. You were created an original.
So what am I trying to say here.....We can go back to be like kids again...we can act like it is Halloween all year around (but you might want to loose the wig and the outfit!!!!)

It is time to Uncover those dreams and to .......Dream Big!

I have to warn you though.....start acting like a kid, being able to laugh at yourself and start pursuing your dream again might have some side effects......
You might feel happier on a daily base, more confident and people around you will start to notice and they will act differently towards you when you are happier and more excited about your life.


Have a Safe and Happy Halloween Every One!

 

                                           Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach
                                                       www.karinglannstam.com

I Will Be on Vacation

I just want to let everyone know that I will be taking some time off.
For the next 3 weeks I will be completely off line and off Social Media.
I will return again on Monday Oct. 26th.

Until Next Time......Take Care and Have a Wonderful October!


                             Karin Glannstam - Personal Success Coach
                                          www.karinglannsta.com